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August


What if? Sunday August 23, 2015

We are many stories - while some are not so pretty, there are many for which I am grateful. I sometimes endure severe depression combined with thoughts of a weariness so severe I find I no longer have energy to live. (My friends with military training call it life termination and this makes me laugh at my serious self.) I often ask myself what do I want to carry out during this final phase three of my life?

Just what are my dreams in this phase? I reflect and squirm. Then I think, what if I am already living my dreams? What if I can be at peace with my world and all that it encompasses? Can I do this? I can and do, most of the time.

My personal dream is to know and have a belief in a higher power (for my Papa, it was nature - for me, it is God). I want to enjoy and harbor special relationships with my now-grown children. I want to love a Beloved.

Additionally, I want to know the morning light on my face upon waking in my treehouse-type cottage and I want to dance until I fall spent and weeping for joy. I want to give a soft landing to rescue animals who are perhaps a bit strange from their earlier unknown journeys.

I wish to live in a lake cottage filled with meaningful yet "non-matching" furniture; write something daily, profound or otherwise; be bold enough to sketch; and, compose music when I wish - 4am is good.

My dream is to have a dedicated falling-down music cottage (parts of three cottages stuck together in the 1940's), where I can be quite loud; design anything with fabric; or linger downstairs in my art studio.

Finally, I want to enjoy my dear friends who challenge, lift and encourage each other; to know the sheer quiet joy of kindness - true kindness toward others and toward myself; and to understand that mean-spirited humans need love more than anyone else - and that I may not have enough love to love them. Yet.

To my world, I salute you. I thank you.

Di
A Moodscope member.

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment below.


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Comments

Heather Angela Sun, Aug 23rd 2015 @ 5:38am

Wow, how poetic. You really paint a picture.

Hopeful One Sun, Aug 23rd 2015 @ 8:50am

Hi Di- a fabulous post.It made me go to my favourite poet Omar Khayyam and he had this to say to " what if?"

"Ah ,fill the Cup: what boots it to repeat
How Time is slipping underneath our Feet:
Unborn,Tomorrow,and dead Yesterday
Why fret about them if Today be sweet."

Verse 37 ,The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam.

Di Sun, Aug 23rd 2015 @ 3:37pm

Thank you, Heather Angela (inspiring name!).

Di Sun, Aug 23rd 2015 @ 3:42pm

Hello, dear Hopeful One ~ It is a fine day indeed when I am reminded of Khayyam's written beauties. I am curious about the first line's meaning to you? The words beg to be studied slowly. Lovingly, Di

Heather Angela Sun, Aug 23rd 2015 @ 5:50pm

Nobody has ever remarked on my name before. Thanks Di, you have made me feel (just a tiny bit) inspiring !

Hopeful One Sun, Aug 23rd 2015 @ 8:48pm

Hi Di - one could interpret the Cup as the cup of Life. Omar was fond of a glass of wine and maybe he meant fill my cup of wine I. He felt he should repeat something he said in another verse that there sent is the only moment we know.That's my take for what it's worth

Di Mon, Aug 24th 2015 @ 12:19am

Dearest Hopeful One ~
I like your interpretation. This moment is all we have. Please fill it (the glass) again. Thank you. Be well, my friend.
Lovingly,
Di

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