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Unafraid of murder! Monday March 17, 2014

Over the past few years there have been over twenty murders in my house.

The police were never called; no one was ever arrested, and all the cases were all solved very satisfactorily with the help of a good dinner and rather a lot of wine. Yes, these were murder dinner parties (very popular in the late eighties and early nineties).

Now, none of these murder mysteries came out of a box. Instead, I had enormous fun writing them all. I can remember driving home from the very first one I had been invited to thinking "Well, I can do better than that!" I started plotting the next day and three weeks later sat down with seven friends for an evening entitled "No Mark of Drowning" (a misquotation from The Tempest).

Why am I telling you this? Not because I want to brag, but rather the opposite. I have a confession to make. Ever since I was thirteen I have wanted to write slushy romance stories. Some aspire to great works of literature; not me: I just want to write the soppy stuff.

Up in the loft are half a dozen started and abandoned stories, in my head are a hundred more but none of these have seen even one word onto pc screen or paper.

Why? Because I'm scared. Unlike the murder parties I have no sense of "But of course I can!"

I'm scared they won't come out the way I see them in my head. I'm scared that they will all peter out in chapter six; that my characters won't want to play with me; that my readers will sneer at me; that, in short, this will be yet another dream at which I've failed.

And that would be depressing: overwhelmingly depressing because it's such a precious dream.

But at fifty, I've realised that there's more writing time behind me than ahead; that if I can consistently write a blog a week then I do have the discipline to write a full length novel; that publishing has never been easier; that I don't want to die with my stories still trapped inside.

So I've taken the risk and started. Yes, it's terrifying, but it's only words after all.
So what do you think of "75 Hues of Purple" as a working title?

A Moodscope member.

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Anonymous Mon, Mar 17th 2014 @ 7:12am

Yes!!! I'm not alone....a hundred of stories trapped inside of me and treating me to let them out - as I think...was it my 50th birthday when they started treating me?
It's a deal - you started - I will start blogging as well...
Have a beautiful writing time...

Anonymous Mon, Mar 17th 2014 @ 9:30am

i love that you are finally doing what you obviously have a very good deal of talent for

just remember to be kind to yourself and the fact your doing now rather then just dreaming is brilliant

keep up the good work hun you can do it

idiosyncraticeye Mon, Mar 17th 2014 @ 9:48am

Go for it! :)

Mary Mon, Mar 17th 2014 @ 10:08am

Yes - do go for it! I find writing tremendously good therapy, and doing it consistently builds up your confidence muscles. Let me know (via Caroline) your blog address and I promise I will visit you and make encouraging comments. Don't let those stories and characters wither and die inside you: let them out to breathe and take on their own life. Go on - you can do it! Mon, Mar 17th 2014 @ 10:35am

Great post Mary! Like, like, like,like,...

James Russell Lowell said: 'In creating, the only hard thing is to begin; a grass blade's no easier to make than an oak.'

Anonymous Mon, Mar 17th 2014 @ 1:55pm

Write on!

You're writing for yourself first, because these stories want to get out. And from all the interviews I've seen, many great writers keep producing because each piece never quite matches what they felt inside. So rather than feel discouraged, they take to their computers or pad and pencil and have another go at it.

Anonymous Mon, Mar 17th 2014 @ 6:06pm

Mary, you are a writer! You engage my attention as soon as I start your blogs - every time. It's not too late. You have plenty of time.

Anonymous Tue, Mar 18th 2014 @ 8:47am

I've never commented before on any blogs, even when I've found them interesting and thought provoking, but feel the need to add my support to your decision to push yourself outside of your comfort zone. Good on you - can't wait to hear about the final print! Good luck

Mary Tue, Mar 18th 2014 @ 2:49pm

Thank you all so very very much: you're encouragement is an enormous gift for which I'm truly grateful.I will definitely keep you posted.

Mary Tue, Mar 18th 2014 @ 2:51pm

Oops - I meant "your" of course!

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