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There's good news and there's bad news. Sunday March 30, 2014

My beloved and I went for a hike yesterday; I suffer from a chronic fatigue condition so we have to make careful preparations if I am to accompany him... about one hour in he turned to me and said "there's good news and there's bad news".

"Tell me the bad news" I replied.

Gloomily he said "We are only half way round"... My shoulders sagged. My face fell. I felt depressed and anxious; would I be able to do the whole hike? And he seemed so low at the prospect of being only half way round.

"So what's the good news?" I asked.

Grinning broadly and very brightly he replied "We are already half way round!"

We are all experts at making ourselves feel anxious, miserable, inadequate, angry, guilty... the list is endless. Why not become expert at looking for the positive, putting another spin on it, acting "as if" all is well? Or, if that is not possible, reminding ourselves that "all things pass in time, and this too will pass".

Let us be our own "best friend" and reassure and encourage ourselves.

A Moodscope member.

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Anonymous Sun, Mar 30th 2014 @ 11:18am

Mindfulness helps to teach you to be your own best friend, amongst many other benefits. I recommend it wholeheartedly. Julie.

Anonymous Sun, Mar 30th 2014 @ 12:01pm

Thanks Julie. Frankie

Lex McKee Sun, Mar 30th 2014 @ 1:47pm

The frame and the glass seems to make all the difference, doesn't it? As a wearer of glasses, my day changes in an instant as soon as I put my spectacles on. There's a part of me that wishes my psychological vision could be enhanced that easily. I know, for example, that there's a cliche about seeing the world through rose-coloured spectacles.
Perhaps it is easier than I think? I choose to put my glasses on and my vision of the world changes. With Frankie's touching story there was a sudden switch from one frame to another- from one view to another. No continuum between the two - a simple either/or. So, today, I will choose the positive spectacles!
And, to be honest, I really do need to be reminded of this choice regularly - thank you Frankie.

Anonymous Sun, Mar 30th 2014 @ 2:47pm

You are very welcome Lex - I always appreciate your many words of wisdom;
I realise that it is not always so simple; so "either / or"; however in this instance I just burst out laughing - and once that happens my mood has to lift; maybe my mood was already quite buoyant as on other occasions my response could have been very grumpy and irritable. I do believe though that often there is an element of choice - maybe not in the mood itself but maybe in how we choose to react to it; I loved Rika's final paragraph on her blog 18th February "I wish you a wonderful day; but in the case that you are not having a wonderful day, I offer a knowing smile and hope that tomorrow will be better". Frankie

Julia Sun, Mar 30th 2014 @ 4:44pm

Hi Frankie
Lovely to read your blog. It made me laugh. I agree I too am an expert in focusing on the negative. A bit like Eeyore. I do try to see a glass half full but my negative mind is so very powerful. BTW I don't have headaches now I take the Amitryp every night. I have tried cutting down but it just doesn't work.I have put on weight though! But on balance I would rather be half a stone heavier and have the benefits of the drug. Still have ups and downs etc etc but somehow I feel better knowing that Amitry isn't addictive and can be taken every night. So big thank you again Frankie. (I often think about you and wonder how you are so it was lovely to see your name today. It was very strange though as immediately I read the first line I thought "that sounds like Frankie"!)xxxx

Julia Sun, Mar 30th 2014 @ 4:52pm

How right you are Lex, a simple either/or between the two. It must be easier to choose the positive when you put it like that,.

Anonymous Sun, Mar 30th 2014 @ 5:01pm

Hello Julia - lovely to have your news; and how strange re; recognising my style ... I saw the consultant this week - perhaps I can reply to you in more detail via Caroline - but it will be later this evening ...Bye for now. Frankie xxx

LittleMoo Sun, Mar 30th 2014 @ 7:42pm

On Friday morning I had a hellish time getting my daughter to school. I couldn't find her water bottle (turns out she'd left it at school), she refused to brush her teeth and various other things went wrong. We got to school just before the bell rang. I left the school feeling totally stressed and wrung out so I texted my husband to moan. However, as I saw what I'd written, I saw it in a different light. I realised that, far from being a disaster, I'd actually done really well to get her to school on time, with water and a snack, and with clean teeth and clothes! Once I looked at it from that perspective my mood lightened immensely.

Anonymous Sun, Mar 30th 2014 @ 8:04pm

Oh so true - I well remember those days! Unfortunately then I lacked your wisdom LittleMoo and such a text would have been sent (probably written in block capitals!). Plus, recounting such "disasters" can be much more "fun" ... You can even get into a "one-up-man-ship" competition of who has had the worst morning ...One thing that did keep me going was the knowledge that all over the country similar scenarios were being played out ...Well done for, as you say, doing really well to get her to school on time - and not just on Friday! Frankie

Silvia A Mon, Mar 31st 2014 @ 8:05pm

Thumbs up!

Silvia A Mon, Mar 31st 2014 @ 8:15pm

I also laughed when I read the good news! A good reminder.

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