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9

November


Taking The Plunge. Monday November 9, 2015

[To listen to the audio version of this blog: https://soundcloud.com/user-299834263/blog-taking-the-plunge]

I broke the bath. Yes, that's right, you heard me correctly. My vast gravitas was way more than the bath could take when I stood in it to have a shower. It cracked up - couldn't take me seriously.

The lady of the house, however, took the situation very seriously. She was not amused.

So we needed a new bath.

After months of unfulfilled promises from various vendors, we finally had a new bath fitted. But one of the old bath's problems remained: the water wouldn't drain away fast enough. The lady of the house was once more unamused.

I'm not a DIY-kind-of-chap. There aren't many practical bones in my body (well, actually, all my bones are very practical, but you know what I mean.) I do, however, understand a little bit of Physics. I showed the lady how the bends in the pipe made it physically impossible for the water to drain away. In fact, I was quite proud of my scientific stance on the matter.

We've known each other for nine years now. She holds me in deep respect. Typically, she totally ignored me! What did she do? She took a plunger to it. The water flowed away perfectly.

"Science" = 0; "Lady of the House" = 1. Game over!

OK, so what's the lesson? For me, it was the danger of commitment to an idea that was wrong. I was totally convinced, convicted I tell you, that there was no way the water would ever flow given the existing plumbing. So I stopped trying to fix it. But it was fixable, wasn't it?

Fancy trying on a new belief for size today?

How about challenging an old one that's stopping you from taking action?

Is there a belief that you've quit on that could do with fresh examination?

Go on, take the plunge!

Lex
A Moodscope member.

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment below.


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Comments

Barbara Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 5:40am

Interesting ideas, very well presented. Thank u for the read.

Barbara Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 5:40am

Interesting ideas, very well presented. Thank u for the read.

Lex Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 7:07am

Thank you Barbara, have a fab day. L'x

LillyPet Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 8:13am

Good morning Lex! Your blog made me smile, resonated with me as it was typical of how things were when I was married! Thank you for being humble and honest enough to share! :))
I'm fascinated by the idea of questioning some of my strongly held beliefs. It's too tall an order! There are two people in my life that get under my skin and make my blood boil. Ok, I make my blood boil when thay do or say things that trigger anger inside me. The belief is that this will always be the case as long as they are in my life, so I'm doomed unless I walk away from a job that I love or cut off my ties with my parents and siblings, neither of which I am prepared to do. I'm not prepared to challenge my beief that I dislike those two people intensely. I guess not every tool fits every blocked plug lol! ;)
On a much more positive note though, I can see that you were completely convinced that there was no solution to the blocked drain, as am I, until you were shown by someone who was free of the belief.
Thank you for planting that seed Lex, I will let it settle and see if it grows! Today I'll keep my eyes open for beliefs that I can challenge! I'm looking firward to it!
Have a great day Lex and thank you! LP :)

LillyPet Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 8:18am

Apologies for typos, sending you all love light and a smile today. LP xx

Lex Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 8:27am

Hello LillyPet... I have something I want to share with you! It will take a while for the idea to germinate, but know for sure that you have inspired me. Have a lovely day, full of light... but whatever you do, don't think about laughing when you think about those who formerly made your blood boil!!! L'xx

LillyPet Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 9:45am

LOL!!! :)) that reminds me of "the artist formerly known as"! :)
For sure whenever either of them pop into my mind they will make me smile, as the the a***** who formerly... Love that! Love the past tense and the whatever you do dont think of...." a pair of pink elephants they are indeed! I'd forgotten how in response to Alice's blog once I likened them to a couple of the characters!
Thanks for the smiles and That idea in the making! Moodscope is like a lovely warm greenhouse full of wonderful creations! Off to work to not think about laughing! ;)) LP xx

Mary Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 9:56am

Hi Lex. Wonderful and thought inspiring post as always. I am currently being challenged on a formerly positive belief - that, once I had come up from a depression that was it for a few months and I could just stop the medication and carry on with normal life. This last time - oops - a week of "normal" scores on Moodscope, no meds, and I crash down again. So - a rethink of that belief, a re-examination of evidence, more data to put into the computation. It could be that my respite was a "God-given" blessing to co-incide with my trip to America. It could be that the non-stop activity in America was too much too soon for my physical system weakened by 6 weeks' sofa-surfing. It could be that the "normal" scores were medication assisted... Who knows. But that former belief is now seriously compromised and I feel rather shot down in flames. So I am now looking for another powerful and positive belief around it and am open to suggestions. So pleased you have a functioning bath my friend, and those nearest to you no longer need to use clothes pegs on their noses when in your company!

Bearofliddlebrain Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 10:30am

So, Lex, when the bath cracked up - was it because it thought...you're joking...you're not getting in here..you're having a laugh?? Tee hee...soz pet, only jesting!
It's funny (peculiar) how something like that has given you a great idea for a blog!! Anyway, am chuffed to liddle mint balls that you are back to your own special fragrance and not knocking out family and friends with a pungent whiff!
I'm a bit low at the moment and having pulled a muscle in my back hasn't helped over the last day and night. (There, you can laugh at me now limping around like a limpet with a limp!)
My mood has lowered. Pain has been bad and am back to barely any sleep which never helps my low mood. I'm trying hard not to go back to the doctor to get tablets. I have been off meds since March this year, but am thinking, crying at pain is ok...but crying at Downton Abbey, soppy films and Coronation Street, oh and the John Lewis advert is not good.
I believed in myself for months, thinking I could deal with anything and everything, and I have been doing it all without medication, but now am not so sure. Big challenge for a liddle Bear x

the room above the garage Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 10:47am

Hello darling bear, so sorry to hear about your back. Full empathy! And always when you don't need it...but do take it as a sign of needing to change something xxx. As for meds, they've never been right for me and so I choose to be without. If times were grave, I'd reconsider but personally I feel stronger without. And I like tears. They show me where I am. They're practical and physically wash out the chemicals and hormones that need it. You have listed things that would make a glass eye cry!! :-) If I may chuck in my tuppence worth, I'd say you need to talk it over more before you decide. Partner, doctor, a friend, someone on here. I'm not in any way against meds but I can sense hesitation and that tells me you need to explore more first. Xxx

Caroline Ashcroft from Moodscope Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 11:23am

Bear, I cry at all of those - I've never thought there was anything wrong with it - I'm just soppy! cx

Norman Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 11:23am

Bear, I will be so proud of you in a few days when I read that the back pain has gone, you are sleeping like a log, and your mood is better. And if you can do it without meds: wow! Respect!

Bearofliddlebrain Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 11:38am

Fangu to all three of you :) sobbing my bestest at the wonderful responses. My doctor said a few months ago, when I checked in with him, that yes, it's ok to cry, which is why I keep going without returning to him. I expect it's the lack of sleepicus and the nagging back pain that's causing so much trubble :/. Have got a shift on and am half way through making soup and not putting too much pressure on joints or self...so that's a good start. Have t finish now as am wetting my pootery thing with tears. You are such a kind bunch x x x

danielle Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 1:06pm

also crying at all of those! don't panic just yet Bear, it may be that with your back being in a pain it is all getting a little much. you are strong and a clever bear xxx ps the other day i gave myself a little congrats for getting through a day with no tears - which brought tears! cant win!

Vanessa Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 1:44pm

sending hugs, Bear. And tissues. X

Bearofliddlebrain Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 2:11pm

Thankees, Danielle and Vanessa, hugs, (tissues) and the fact that you've commented all help. Big Bear hugs returns! x x x x

Lex Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 2:11pm

Crying is cool. Only those weird folks don't do it. What aren't they on? I cried at the Star Wars trailer... L'x

Norman Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 2:45pm

Bear, what does half a soup look like?

Bearofliddlebrain Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 3:42pm

Well, Norman, I should have taken a pic! It looked bubbly and steamy...would love to say 'just like me!!' Lol!!!! Lolilol :0) but then it was also lumpy at the halfway stage...yup, I know what you're thinking...just don't dare go there....!!!! Tee hee...pain slowly subsiding: rest of soup finished and some eaten at yunch time with daughter, home from work. Bear x

the room above the garage Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 11:03am

Hello Lex, I do not believe you broke the bath. Clearly there was already a crack. (Optional cymbal smash for those who are sniggering.) Merely standing on it would open it up. There. Re-framed to protect the innocent! Just let me know if there are other instances. I am The Re-framer and I will put my pants on over tights if I have to! I could probably stretch to a eye mask made from the porridge box. "Is there a belief you've quit on..." Yes. A few. Too many. And, by using the word 'quit', a strong, final word, you've reminded me that winners never quit and quitters never win. I'm a slow burn and so I know I will not make this change quickly but you have opened up my thinking and so I can now carry this with me. It will trundle along in my conscious and subconscious and, if I may, it might pop up in a future blog. Bathe on my friend.

the room above the garage Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 11:11am

And...thank you, you've propelled me to do my score. Something I find hard but something I should not try to hide from. Letting the elephant out the wardrobe!

LillyPet Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 8:14pm

Hi ratg/ Ratg? Sorry to keep pop up here as you were replying to Lex. Just a thought. The scoring may not be as scary as you think if you do it loads. I know my range and am getting to know roughly where I'll be. Im getting to know why my score will be low. Often now I just write "tired" as it's usually in the morning! Some things stay good, like scared? Of so and so? Hell no!!! Not saying its the same, but It really is just a machine giving predictabe feedback. Maybe you have a different membership or version? Or maybe your scores are showing you something more. I'm not preaching or prying, just thinking that feeling scared is one thing, looking at your scores may be scary, but apparently just the very act of doing them brings them up. Dont understand how or why, as Lex say's maybe it's a kind of magic! The magic is in you, I feel it everytime you appear! I dont get the way it works, I just trust and have faith in the process. Hope you're doing ok. P xx

Di Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 11:13am

Dearest Lex,
I am squealing with glee over this post! As an experiment I listened as well (2nd time). Goodness, I really needed a refresher for my tired & morbidly refecting brain. Today I will tackle an ongoing & difficult relationship struggle with renewed vigor. No matter the outcome, it will be presented with calming kindness & humor, thanks to your fresh wit. Lovingly, Di

Bearofliddlebrain Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 11:39am

Oh so lovely to see you here again Di, hugs, Bear x

Di Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 12:22pm

Thank you, sweet Bear! It is soooo good to be back in the fold. Sending you healing energy. Lovingly, Di

Norman Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 11:18am

Lex hi! Loved the post! Depressives are really good at rationalising their failures, it's called "learned helplessness." We become so convinced that there is no point that we don't even try. (And yes, I do it myself.) Next time your partner will be so impressed when you wield that plunger like an expert.

Bearofliddlebrain Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 11:47am

Norman! You've just made me lol! I have an image of a plunger-wielding-Lex!!!!! Thankees x

Lex Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 2:08pm

OK, so I'm seeing a new breed of SuperMoodscopers, ready to face any challenge. First requirement, tights - must be the right colour/color for you - (see Mary)-NO FISHNETS. Second requirement, 'pants' - or for our US buddies 'panties'/'underpants'. Third, eye mask made from porridge box (thanks RATG. And, fourth, thanks to Norman, the power plunger. These come in several sizes and up to three may be strapped to your utility belt. Plungers may be attached forcibly to the forehead of any annoying work-colleagues, family members or friends, or even any two people that make your blood boil (LillyPet, please note)... but not to strangers. One plunger is thus always kept spare for emergencies. If the plunger sticks, all SuperMoodscopers are duty-bound to shout "Exterminate!" in the manner of a Dalek (Check out "Dr Who" if you haven't experienced the Daleks)... followed by collapsing in a heap laughing. If you keep your job/relationship, know that the connection will never be the same! Excellent! L'x

Lex Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 2:09pm

ps. If I can work out how to do it... picture to follow...

danielle Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 1:09pm

another great blog Lex. thank you. I love this friendly warm place that is moodscope blog. It is like i have just sat down on a comfy sofa and youve all given me a big hug, wrapped me in a blanket and brought me tea and cake, love to you all xx

Lex Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 2:10pm

Chocolate cake with orange creme filling? L'x

Vanessa Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 1:45pm

Thank you for making me smile, and challenging me, both in the same sentence. Impressive!!

Lex Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 2:10pm

"It's a kind of magic..." L'x

Lex Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 2:18pm

And seriously, Mary, Bear, buddies... I'm a fan of grey. In other words, of a continuum as opposed to black vs white. One setback doesn't mean our belief is wrong, it just means it might need a little tweak. You, dear Mary, are a phenomenal chemistry lab - wonderfully made. You've tracked the ebb and flow of moods very diligently, but there may be a new chemical in town or a new stimulus that has changed your own internal ecosystem. As you've accurately tracked before you will, I am confident, recalibrate, and re-track... and you will know what new signals to notice.

I saw a quote over the weekend that might just have been made for you: "Which came first, the Phoenix or the flames?" Your belief may have been shot down but it will rise again a more magnificent Phoenix and everywhere it flies, there shall be blogs! L'x

The Gardener Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 5:39pm

What is going on here? Pants and fish net stockings? Have I strayed into the wrong web-site. Sometime I am going to have to take the plunge to call in help. Every day something breaks in our house - as it is large and I am currently alone, I just shut the room and live in the rest. Tears figure above also, and I am struggling. Left my husband in a terrible mood - moved to convalescence - lovely nurses, all introducing themselves, director of hospital lovely (and crazy about horses like eldest son and g-g daughter) personal welcome. He's threatening suicide. He says he wants to come home - I cannot cope with him physically - he has every facility there to help him get strong - given the last few months he is unlikely to co-operate with anybody. So, dear friends, I AM taking the plunge - a first, a girlie lunch - I have an amazing dress from 30 years ago which I can still wear - that night our erudite monk is going through Genesis, I shall sit at his feet, he's brilliant. Cheerful painter at work in new house. Taking the plunge physically, I can swim, but badly. I am paranoid about getting out of my depth (whereas I will cheerfully plunge into other dangers) because - I can SEE through that water, how can it support me? In the swimming pool, as soon as I see the deeper sign, I flounder, cling to the wall and scramble for safety. Anybody been through that and succeeded? Whole family brilliant swimmers, of course. Out of depth once, because d-in-law, in a spectacular pool on Lombok, I think, said if I did not go down the water slide (a frog's mouth) I would not get a drink. Now there's an idea - if somebody put a double whisky on the edge at the deep-end do you think I'd make it? Really 'fey' tonight, after my bad fall absolutely no rest today, foot hurts like hell, terribly distressed by state of husband and so you lot get in the neck as well. Grateful thanks to all you patient people. XXX

Norman Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 6:56pm

TG: I love star floats, ever done one? If not find a quiet bit of pool, lean backwards keeping your arms behind you as deep as you can get them and your face (or at least your nose) above water, then let your legs leave the floor and just float. Enjoy the feeling of the water supporting you. I suppose it's a form of mindfulness really.

susan Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 7:20pm

TG, i'm now quite wary of giving any kind of advice whatsoever....but here i am thinking about your poor foot, of all things. Why is it still hurting like hell? Do you ice it? Have you had it xrayed or bound? Perhaps it needs some further attention? Hate to think of you in physical pain when you've got all the other kind of pain to endure. Hugs. xx

LillyPet Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 7:32pm

Ooh that sounds lovely, will definitely try Norman! :)

LillyPet Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 8:34pm

TG, I too hope that you get your foot seen to. You are strong, but you also keep going without help for much longer than many, and with all the hospital visits but maybe the stress, your foot and your whole well being are not getting what you need. Oxygen mask first. I know, easy for me to give advice... You and how you are doing are important to us. We don't need patience, we care. We've all been distressed it sucks! Big warm hugs and please let us know if youve already had your foot looked at. LP xxx

susan Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 7:07pm

Today it's official. You are all stupendously bonkers. And completely loveable. I cannot possibly keep up but enjoy every word. It's a plunger party. Hugs, Les. xx

susan Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 8:19pm

Oh Lex, please forgive me. It was a typo...i know exactly who you are:) xx

LillyPet Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 7:30pm

I've been thinking of you guys today as I travelled to and fro.
Debs, susan, Bear. Are you feeling well at the moment Ratg? As Mary said we do bounce back, feel well again, so well it all seems to have gone. One good day one bad. A bad week and one good day even two. Good months, seasons or annual episodes different for everyone I guess, variable too. Ive remained on meds because Im scared that if I have ups and downs that Im just about able to manage, (and Moodscope knows sometimes I dont!) I cant imagine how I'd function with a fulltime job, 2 large mouths to feed, (a budgie lol! to keep alive and " No you're not having a kitten or puppy any ither dependent for me to fit in to the chaos, hence the ex in front of husband!!) You'd think that as young adults they''d have learnt to use a plate and spoon by now! What's for dinner???? !!! :))) The house the garden the car, modern life basically, for which I hasten to add I am beyond grateful for! :). Massive respect to all you peeps who are determined to be you without any meds. Maybe one day I'll think about aproaching my gp to agree a very slow and gradual reduction, but WOULD NEVER consider doing that without an agreed prescribed change.
If it helps anyone My gp first recommended prozac
When my first born was a year old at a routine check up for him I think. I was tearful and overwhelmed. Pretty normal now I think about it. Caroline's right crying at all those things is embarassing, but perfectly normal, I can't watch romcons or any disney type movie with a soppily happy ending without buckets of blubbling! People being sweet to me when I'm not feeling 100% does it too. Again perfectly normal.
But there are times, hormone related usually, when I cant control the crying and that becomes an issue if you have a dalek as a line manager! Time off not acceptable, crying not acceptable, exterminate!!!
Should I be on medication in order to work? Hell no! Do I need to pay the morgage? That would be a yes. 30 years down the line Moodscope is the first longterm support that had worked consistently to help through good and not so good times.
Anyway less of the heavy stuff....
Lex! I literally cannot wait to see that cartoon image! I can see it now! Footwear is important, snowboots are great at the forthcoming time of year, great for stomping out for-a-walk-in -this-weather- you must- be- having-Bear-bath-larf! cue ratgs sound effects! Bit pricey? No problem! A nice chunky pair of Uggs preferably well worn in (wards) (hope google images can help with that patticular cultural reference!) or similar will suffice, all the rage on the catwalk this season dont you know? ;) Hard hats can come in very handy for any daleks-formerly-known-as-bloodboilers on the loose! Yep those two Super Plungers have stuck fast, must have been that Superglue I had in my utility belt! LP ;))
I've looked up laughter therapy but forced laughter doesnt do it for me. Dont wish to dis any practioners, maybe Ive only seen unfunny examples. We on the otherhand may be onto something! I imagine there are comedians who are depressed.
I follwed your advice Lex, what ever I did if Two pink elephants ( pink helium balloon elephants!) formerly known as bloodboilers, popped onto my head, Whatever I did I didnt think of laughing and of course I didnt laugh, but Darn it thought about it! It was very tempting to pop those has been baloons, their party's over! But I let them float on by higher and further away than I could see. Need glasses thes days! :))
Love, sunlight and laughter, or at least a smile to all. Thanks again for a very uplifting blog Lex
LP xxx

susan Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 8:31pm

Dear LP, for a tiny split second there, i thought i detected some guilt about being on meds. Just want to say that i think you are wise, wise and wise for being on them and staying on them until you are in a less stressful phase in your life and can systematically test going off them....if you want to....maybe...someday. If i had all the responsibilities you carry at the moment, i'd be on them, too. As for soppy tears: when i first met my husband, we watched Wuthering Heights and i burst into floods of tears. He thought it was so endearing...until he found out that i'd seen it four times. It's good to cry. Better out than in. xx

LillyPet Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 9:00pm

Thanks so much susan. You're absolutely right! Defo bit of guilt/ feeling weak creeping in, well spotted! :) Yep for now, meds bottom of the to do list! :) I dont mind a good cry, love the idea of washing away stress hormones and toxins of all kinds! I dont cry with those that U help, just in the past, if the powers that be were heavy handed with me ( carefully reframed thanks to our queen of reframing! :) I have been told that I'm allowed to cry when in the office being "told off" fir crying, but if I do they'll have too keep having review meetings till I stop. And if Im seen as weak by others and they criticise and have a pop at me, Im not to take it personally and definately not cry! Heaven forbid! If I excuse myself because I'm about to start leaking, I have to have a meeting or a "Conversation" about it. If I explain myself, I get shut down and told that "we are going round in circles! My explanations granted are long as you can see! But why ask if they dont want to listen? :) I'm ok at the moment, it's not them that are important in my job, much as they like to think they are. They are welcome to their petty power tripping ways! One day my time will come! I wouldnt want to be a manager for all tge money in the world and if I were, I'd be way too nice to everyone, unless of course they are daleks with plungers stuck on their heads! Maybe thats what they think I am.... Thanks hun xxx

LillyPet Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 7:51pm

Hi Mary,
I feel better on holiday too. I had put it down to a break in the routine and comfort zone almost breaking the cycle of feeling low. If ever I can afford a holiday, I choose lots of sun and things that I love small inexpensive but very good for my wellbeing! No stress, no pressure, no one telling me what to do or clock watching. No clutter, a nice clear space with only what you need to use and feel good with you.No dieting only healthy but delish food from the region. Friendly welcoming people, who you dont have to remain connected to unless you want to... Not caring what you look like because no one knows you! I've made it a priority to have a holiday however small to look forward to.
You've made me think about how opposite my daily life feels and whether I can bring a few of those holiday vibes a bit closer to home! LP xxx

LillyPet Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 9:34pm

So sorry Lex, gone way over the top today. Hijacked your blog and will probably hit a brick wall at some point tomorrow. Only to rise again! Probably need to go and chill out, try to float in the bath without breaking it!

Bearofliddlebrain Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 10:29pm

Oh Lillypet...me thinks you do need a long disk ins esrm bubbly bath...without plungers! Keep well, sweetie.... Bear x

LillyPet Mon, Nov 9th 2015 @ 10:57pm

Thank you hunny Bear. I hope that your back eases a little so that you can get some sleeps. LP xxx

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