Sow before bedtime. Monday October 26, 2015
[To hear an audio version of this blog follow this link: https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/sow-before-bedtime]
"Ah, the seeds of dreams!" I thought to myself as I laid there in the bed, exhausted. I had spent the night wandering through a distressing dreamscape disturbed by nightmares. Now, I was wondering why the unconscious mind seemed to fixate on so many negative imaginations - its creative genius perverted to divert me from a good night's sleep.
There was some comfort in tracing the seeds of those dreams back to the activities that had planted them that day. As I get older, hairs grow inside my ears - a ridiculous if somewhat bemusing state of affairs. I can perceive no purpose for them there. Penelope has a passion for removing them, so she had spent a happy ten minutes deforesting my own miniature Eden project biomes! This seed became a dream about going deaf - very unpleasant, but I could see the link. The other nightmare was about my studio burning down - guilt, I think, because I hadn't checked on it when I was down in the town that day. Clearly, I sowed the seeds. My unconscious was the gardener. And emotion played her or his part in the direction of growth.
I don't like nights like that. So I revisited an age old question: can we direct our destiny? Even if this is only partially true, it offers hope. Here, I had the 'evidence' that my own activities, emotions and thoughts had played their part in the drama that had developed.
So before bedtime: sow before bedtime. I will deliberately seek a happy emotion to be my resting state before sleep (and, believe me, I know how hard that will be at times - but I will 'seek' it.) I will load some wholesome thoughts that I purposefully choose - perhaps through reading some poetry or inspirational quotes. And I shall act as Director even if I cannot play the full role as Producer. I shall be very direct with my inner Producer and suggest that he should create a pleasant masterpiece in the Theatre of the Night!
A Moodscope member.
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