Moodscope's blog



Round Pegs in Square Holes. Tuesday September 10, 2013

Being a creative, right brain thinker, and working for many years as a chartered accountant (yes, really), I struggled. I felt utterly out of place. Now, of course, I work in a more creative field, so things aren't quite so bad.

But on Thursday I attended a course for new tutors teaching in the lifelong learning sector (community learning and evening classes). On the course there were tutors who were holding classes on Badminton, Basic cookery, Mandarin, Cake Decorating, Guitar, Graphic Design, Chair-Based Exercise and Mixed Media Craft.

What was fantastic (and very unusual in my experience) was the way that each of us, and our courses, were held to be of equal value. In the standard educational system, academic subjects are given higher priority and even cookery has been replaced by the more scientific "food technology".

In the lifelong learning community however, Bee-Keeping seems to have the same status as Mandarin. Left brain and right brain thinkers are equally valued. Practical crafts are as important as academic subjects.

We all need to be valued – and we are all of worth. Just consider whether the people with whom you choose to surround yourself do actually value you. As a result of that you may wish to consider if you are actually in the right place with the right people.

When I worked as an accountant there was no place for the things I do really well, so I wasn't valued. As an Image Consultant those same talents and skills are essential and are treasured by my clients.

Don't be a round peg in a square hole (and I purposely use the words in that order). Somewhere there's a hole you fit perfectly, with people who will love the way you fit around them. Start looking for that place and those people and have faith they'll turn up.

Rattling around in a place where you feel constantly inadequate is a sure-fire way of fostering depression, and that's not very sensible, regardless of which side of the brain you're thinking from.

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment on our Blogspot:

Permalink  |  Blog Home


Anonymous Tue, Sep 10th 2013 @ 9:17am

Marvellous advice Mary. A brilliant post. So true.

Aeia Tue, Sep 10th 2013 @ 10:23am

Sums up how I feel. Just need to find a way to make the change to something different and figure out what shape my hole is :)

Christine Tue, Sep 10th 2013 @ 11:01am

Feeling as though this is what is happening to me right now....our house move from a pretty seaside town on the East coast of England, to a small and (differently) pretty seaside town on the West coast of Wales. I'm hoping my shape which I think fits really well here ,will equally fit...or be even more the shape I have to fit in there. My terror is increasing daily....

Anonymous Tue, Sep 10th 2013 @ 11:04am

Mary it feels as if you write just for me! I too was an accountant, and now I consider myself an artist/photographer. The sad thing is that it took 20 years and a breakdown to learn, the good thing , that I did learn - eventually.
Thanks so much for writing, add that to your list of 'artistic' talents.

Gitanjali Sondhi Tue, Sep 10th 2013 @ 11:12am

Really got me thinking ....

Ferial Tue, Sep 10th 2013 @ 12:21pm

Know what you mean, after working 13 years for the Dutch government as a PMO with many ups (but more downs) I feel stuck. I am a creative language person (studied Japanese language and culture)so I am taking stepping steps to make a change. A bit scary after all those years (and at my age, 45) and with a very difficult economic situation here in Holland, but worth it's while.

Anonymous Tue, Sep 10th 2013 @ 2:12pm

I agree with the others that this was a superb, highly thought-provoking post. Obvious in a way what Mary is saying but something we all lose sight of much of the time.
I really needed to see this today, thank you.

Anonymous Tue, Sep 10th 2013 @ 6:06pm

I love this site. This week I began an insurance sales role. Despite my manager already going on about how I shouldn't mention either word during my cold telesales calls, I have just spent an enjoyable hour around an industrial estate pigmoring such advice. Because I am in a happy space today, it doesn't matter if my door knocking is quirky or left field. Tonight, I will go to a networking event where I know all will be fine. Being bipolar is a manageable condition. I value myself and have a genuine interest in people. While other salespeople may sell more, the relationships I will build will stick. Peace and Love.

Julia Tue, Sep 10th 2013 @ 6:09pm

Yes. Good brave thinking.

Anonymous Tue, Sep 10th 2013 @ 8:10pm

After a difficult day at work, I drove home thinking "this is it...I can't do this work anymore" That's a big thing, after 20 years in the business! But then I read your post and it could not have been more timely. I envy those who have discovered where their shape does fit...I don't know where to start. But at least I have realised where I want to finish! Thanks for a very apt message!

Anonymous Tue, Sep 10th 2013 @ 11:23pm

Thank you :-) as I read the blog today I thought of how fortunate I have to have a few friends who appreciate me. This was not always the case and it has taken a lot of effort to get to this point. But it reminded me that I am of value and that if people don't value me then they are not worth having as friends

Michael Bush Wed, Sep 11th 2013 @ 12:57am

Hi, I was really touched by this post. I'm also aware that I'm working a job that I really don't want to work in an atmosphere where I don't really belong. It's not the people I work with, but rather the company itself and the people I serve. What keeps me going though is this thought that maybe, just maybe, I can force the fit by bending myself or the situation in just the right way. I keep adjusting and adjusting, but I feel like I'm going to break. I've relied on my coworkers and the few people I have connections with to keep me going for the most part, but something tells me that it isn't worth it, that there's something better for me if I can just move on. However, I am trained to believe that this thinking is just wishful thinking, or that I'm just running away from my issues, and that happiness is an "inside job" and doing something different really isn't going to change anything. But maybe that type of thinking wasn't meant for this situation. Maybe I need to hear that I am strong enough, that I am worth it, and that I can begin to create what I want with my life. When do I start planning to do something else? How do I know what that something else is? These are all questions running through my mind. However, just writing this post and thinking about these things, I already feel a bit of hope that I am moving in the right direction. I'm already changing my place of residence to a more supportive and beautiful place. Maybe my work will change shortly as well. Thanks so much for your wonderful and inspiring post :)! There's also a part of me that doesn't want to give up because I believe that there are still opportunities for me to really make a difference if I can just talk to the right people and get my voice heard. Maybe it's about time I tried to do that too.

Anonymous Fri, Sep 13th 2013 @ 9:20am

Thanks Julia. Have a great Friday! Regards, Richard.

You must login to leave a comment.

What is Moodscope?

Moodscope members seek to support each other by sharing their experiences through this blog. If you’d like to receive these daily posts by email, just sign up to Moodscope now, completely free of charge.

Moodscope is an innovative way for people to treat their own low mood problems using an engaging online tool. Anyone in the world can accurately assess and track daily mood scores over a period of time. We have proved that the very act of measuring, tracking and sharing mood can actually lift it. Join now.

Blog Archive


Posts and comments on the Moodscope blog are the personal views of Moodscope members, they are for informational purposes only and do not constitute medical advice. Moodscope makes no representations as to the accuracy or completeness of any information on this blog or found by following any of the links.

Moodscope will not be liable for any errors or omissions in this information nor for the availability of this information. The owner will not be liable for any losses, injuries, or damages from the display or use of this information.

We exist to help people to positively manage their moods. You can contribute by taking the test, sharing your experience on the blog or contributing funds so we can keep it free for all who need it.

Moodscope® is © Moodscope Ltd 2018. Developed from scales which are © 1988 American Psychological Association. Cannot be reproduced without express written permission of APA.