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8

June


Have you reached your ULP? Sunday June 8, 2014

I recently read a book by Gay Hendricks called 'The Big Leap'. It suggests that when we worry, blame or criticise ourselves or others, we have simply encountered what he calls the 'upper limit problem' or ULP. This limit is set in childhood and it's what stops us from achieving our true potential. Just by developing an awareness of when we have reached a ULP (some clues are criticism, blame or worry-thoughts) it's a sign that you are about to break through to a new reality, in to something entirely different, outside your comfort zone (the big leap). But our ULP stops us. Hendricks says that if you overcome it, you will lead a happy and fulfilled life ALL OF THE TIME. (The view that life is yin/yang, all about ups and downs etc. is a myth, he says).

I wondered whether the new mindset I acquired from reading Hendricks book could help me with the ups and downs. In fact, my mission is to conquer them (I haven't done so yet, but I think its down to practice).

Now, every time I have a worrying thought, I deal with it if it is within my power to act, and I dismiss it immediately if it is outside my control. When I find myself criticising others or myself, I think 'how intruiging! What's going on around me that's making me reach my ULP?', and have then turned my attention to naming the fear inside.

For example, when I over-reacted to my 5 year old spilling some apple juice the other day, I realised that the real issue was a fear brewing inside me of a meeting I had to go to the following day. It had been bugging me all morning and the kitchen/life/everything was getting more chaotic by the minute as it played on my mind. When I blamed my 5 year old for making the place a mess, I realised it was my mind that was messy. When I realised the problem, I apologised for overreacting and explained to my son that I was worrying about a meeting I had the following day. I was afraid that they would coerce me into leaving my current job to work for myself.

I decided not go to the meeting the next day. But I did name my fear. The big leap for me is to leave my job and work for myself. It will happen - but in my own time.

Rosanna
A Moodscope member.


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Comments

Betty D Sun, Jun 8th 2014 @ 8:09am

Thank you I had settled for accepting life's ups and downs - having woken up this morning feeling really anxious - I'm going to redefine it as reaching my ulp . I cannot imagine feeling happy and fulfilled and without fear all of the time

Anonymous Sun, Jun 8th 2014 @ 10:31am

Rosanna, your blog was so perfect this morning. Too many struggles right now, but this ulp vs up and down is a healing thought -- the idea of evolving through life rather than just hoping things can return to a familiar holding pattern. I am going to buy Gay Hendricks book and take it from there. Thank you for helping me today. xx

Anonymous Sun, Jun 8th 2014 @ 10:47am

My ULP seems to be family matters - my mum and my sister being ill - and career matters (getting paid?) as well as benefit worries.

Richard Sun, Jun 8th 2014 @ 11:14am

I admire your bravery for writing, Anonymous. National Debt Helpline is good. I hope your Mum and Sister get through. Keep writing.
Peace and Love, Rich x

Richard Sun, Jun 8th 2014 @ 11:20am

Rosanna.
Thankyou for a wonderful and honest blog.
Stephen King wrote The Shining. He says that the kernel of an idea came when his young son spilt water over his draft pages. King is my second-favourite writer, and a wonderfully honest man.
I think it's why I like rock music. Despite the dark lyrics and clothes, when you scratch beneath the surface, shining love appears.
Thankyou for helping me today.
Warmest regards,
Rich x

Julia Sun, Jun 8th 2014 @ 12:27pm

ULP is an interesting idea but for me not having read the book, quite a complex one to get my head around. I have not heard of it before. I am wondering how I break through the worry and anxiety screen which has built up around me over the years. I am sure it requires much effort and mental energy on my part to see my personal stagnating upper limit as a platform from which to soar to the next step. I shall definitely have to explore this idea further; if it works, I wish I someone had come up with this idea years ago!.Thank you Rosanna. It's not often that a blog throws up a totally unexpected and new concept for progressing further than the point we have reached in our lives.

Julia Sun, Jun 8th 2014 @ 6:10pm

Please write more blogs Rosanna and good luck with your big leap into working for yourself. I feel certain you will achieve this.

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