23

February


How often do you find yourself knowing what you should be doing, but unable to feel it, or motivate yourself to just get on and do it?

The last nine months have been a real roller-coaster of highs and lows that has made me re-examine my depression of the last seven years - that grew out of the existential angst that has been ever-present since my teens - and think whether there are three guys - adding a “high” guy to the low one and the “normal one”.

So while I wait for access to NHS psychological services, I am going through the same old “stories” with a case worker who is there to make sure I am helping myself. But there’s the rub, to quote good ‘ol Hamlet. I know what I should be doing to help myself - I don’t need someone else to do that for me!

I can tell you all about the four pillars of happiness, and explain how my practice of Tai Chi fits all of them - but it doesn’t help me get out and do a “set” first thing in the morning.

I know about “eating the frog” and how to schedule tasks in a day for optimal performance - but it doesn’t help me get started on a day my “get up and go” has gone.

And as for destructive feedback cycles of stories we tell our selves, I am a master at identifying those and how they keep me trapped in unhelpful loops - but it doesn’t stop me repeating them.

I know the theory - what I need in some emotional connection that will help me move forward.

What do you need to help you put theory into practice?

Just some guy, you know
A Moodscope member.

ps. If you are wondering about the title to the blog, it’s another one of those stories. I have grade 8 music theory, but scored less than 15% on my last oral exam! I can tell you all about the principles of chord progressions, but can’t clap a rhythm or sing/hear an interval in my head! Theory over practice strikes again.

Thoughts on the above, please feel free to post a comment below.


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