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Don't. Monday November 28, 2016

Don't think about an elephant.
Nor a neon-pink giraffe.
Do not think about yawning.
Or stifling a laugh!
So did you?

It's virtually impossible for your conscious mind not to do anything.

It cannot not worry about anything it is worrying about.
It cannot not think about anything it's thinking about.
It cannot not focus on anything you command it not to focus on.
In fact, what you resist persists.
And what persists has consequences... that you may not want.
So we need a better way...

If anything has been burned into my consciousness over the last two weeks it has been:

Focus ONLY on what you want.
That was a quick Pulse, wasn't it?

But the truth just needs to be a simplified as it can be...

You get MORE of what you focus on
So focus ONLY on what you want!

A Moodscope member.

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment below.

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the room above the garage Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 6:04am

Are you meditating?
I feel a change!
This prescription is working for me too albeit I still feel I am learning to walk again (even though it has been a while). I'm running The Hare and the Tortoise through my head :-)
Just keep swimming, Dory said!
Thank you, love ratg x.

Bearofliddlebrain Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 7:39am

I can't stop thinking about Dory now! Lol ;) Bear x

LP Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 8:21am

Not a bad image not to think about! Love it! Thanks ratg :) Just keep swiming!xx

Lex Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 9:35am

I'll go with Dory - thank you both xx

Bearofliddlebrain Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 7:44am

Hi Lex,
Focus on what you want? I've been doing that for weeks - visualising the finished's not working! Week 17 of the build starts much as I like these guys...they won't leave!!!! Not their fault - been let down by suppliers...hey ho, fourth toilet might arrive in two weeks time! Ha ha ha!

....when they said they'll be finished by Christmas, I should have asked 'Which one?' !!!!

Bear hugs still abound and I'm still smiling!
Bear x x x

LP Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 8:19am

Glad that you're still in cheery spirits honey B! :) Sounds like they like bearworld too much! LPxx

Lex Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 9:36am

It was a short blog today, wasn't it? There's a glitch which I didn't mention - focusing on what you want gets complex when other people (and their will-power) is involved. Can't promise results there - that's different, but you can stay true to your intention and at least communicate that unambiguously xx

the room above the garage Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 9:45am

Bear...I hope you're not having to use the woods!!!!! :-D You have my full empathy...homeworks can be draining. I wish you a new, fully working toilet soon and that you're all ship shape by next Christmas xxx.

Sally Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 8:32am

I like the saying " what you resist persists", Lex. My mantra for today it's going to be, I think. Focus is a thing I lack so I shall also memorise "Focus ONLY on what you want" thanks, Lex. This is just what I needed to hear today.

Lex Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 9:37am

Hi Sally, just great to keep it simple, isn't it?

LP Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 8:42am

Hi Lex,
Great poem and the timing couldnt be better!

Someone at work caught me off guard last week and landed me with a task that has caused me nothing but worry ever since! Especially at 3am. Its not even work, I've been volunteered! One of those guilt trip things if I dont do my "bit" My options seem to be to fight it, or do what she wants. She literally said" I just wanted to put the thought in your head". And she's suceeded. I feel like telling her to leave my head alone!
...and breathe. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming.... :)

Thank you Lex! I've felt stuck. I'll have to think about what I want that is positive and focus on that.
Peace to all xx

Lex Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 9:39am

Focus - it's a gift. I love your awareeness of the ol' voodoo trick your colleague played on you, "I just wanted to put the thought in your head" - Wow! Accentuate the positive and give the negative 0 attention!!! xx

LP Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 10:05pm

Funny you should pick up on that Lex! I remember her saying that she's a white witch once!! Weird! At the time I did, just that, positive response, but after a week of waking up in the night and worrying about how I could possibly manage the impossible, I've just emailed saying that I've bought what was needed, but just putting it into her head in plenty of time that she'll have to find someone with the right skills to put it together! So I've played right into the negativity I'm afraid! Now I guess I can focus on the positives and what I want. I've got the ball rolling, been realistic and up front about what I can manage and given her time to redelegate! It's going to be an interesting week! LPxx

Mary Wednesday Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 9:37am

Wonderful Lex. For the past fortnight of so I have only been able to focus on hanging on, but now the drugs have kicked in I'm going to focus on getting better and organising my day so I get lots of rest. Now - do I think of that neon pink giraffe or Dory? Well, fish swim better than giraffes so I'll think about Dory! Thanks, my friend. Hugs

Lex Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 9:39am

I think the popular vote is with Dory - swimming in the direction she wants too. Big hug x

LP Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 10:14pm

Really glad to hear that Mary, hugs LP xx

Hopeful One Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 9:39am

Hi Lex- awesome blog and so true. The reason thoughts persist if one resists? My explanation is that our thoughts are all automatic(they are generated in the subconscious where we have no control) bubbling up to our conscious. The important point( I understood that only when I started doing meditation)was that they come with an enormous pull or traction like a magnet.Try to ignore or resist them and they will hold one in their embrace.Pay no attention and they will die a natural death. This does not happen on its own- one needs to train one's mind.

Lecture over- here is our daily endorphin.

A mechanic is removing the cylinder head from the motor of a car when he spots a famous heart surgeon waiting for the service manager to take a look at his Mercedes. The mechanic asks the heart surgeon to come over and says to the surgeon “ I think I do much the same work as you do.I open a car's heart ,take its valves out, replace them,clear the oil ways and then when I finish the car purrs like a kitten." The surgeon leans over and whispers to the mechanic. "Try doing it with the engine running."

Lex Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 9:42am

Great joke, Hopeful One, and thanks for your wise words on the blog too! This is why I love the fact that the conscious mind can at least play a partial role in choosing what it will focus on. "What would I rather have?" It's a great question.

the room above the garage Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 9:49am

Talking of focus...I have meditated on Headspace for 90 days in a row and earned a voucher to give someone else 90 days free. Would anyone like it?

Lex Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 11:23am

You're better than me... I keep paying out and then forgetting - and I teach memory AND get reminders from them! Lol.

Tychi's Mum Tue, Nov 29th 2016 @ 3:21am

I LOVE headspace but I'm not good at making time to do it...that will be my focus this week. Wow, RATG 90 days is impressive. You must be well on your way to having a trained mind. You've inspierd me...I'm aiming for 91 days in a row! Tychi's Mum

LP Tue, Nov 29th 2016 @ 8:46am

Hi ratg, I'd like to try it please! I'm not in a good way at the moment, but I'm pretty sure its hormones. Been stressing about "cake gate" at work! Affecting sleep and have woken up worrying and tearful. Maybe It might help. Well done for achieving it, that's amazing! Has it made a difference to you overall? LPxx

the room above the garage Tue, Nov 29th 2016 @ 6:16pm

Hi LP, that's great! I will send the code to Caroline for you. The first section 'Take Ten' is free and very gentle and simple. This 90 day voucher should see you well into it, try not to stop. After Take Ten (which I did after the morning rush, sometimes in the car!) you do some general intro work and I found this part hardest, it may have been because the sessions were 15 or 20 mins. Now I can choose which 'pack' I'd like to do and each runs for 30 days (I'm doing anxiety at the mo) and the duration is up to you. I do ten minutes each day before leaving bed. You're not meant to do it lying down so I wake and put the light on to wake up fully so I don't fall asleep again. Then I sit up and meditate for ten mins before my shower. If I don't do it then, it wouldn't happen. I can honestly say it has made a HUGE difference to me. I still have all the problems but I can step away a tiny bit and feel that space. I'm interested to see if it might help you. If nothing else, I just love hearing Andy's voice chat to me in the morning :-D It beats kids squabbling or telling my they can't find a clean shirt! Love ratg x.

LP Tue, Nov 29th 2016 @ 8:43pm

Ok that sounds fabulous. Will definitely give it a go, so glad it's helped you. Thanks ratg. LPxxx

Lexi Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 12:27pm

Thanks for the reminder to focus on what I want. We often don't ask for what we want, just what we don't want. And sometimes not getting what we want is a stroke of luck, or divine intervention? Xo lexi

Lex Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 7:54pm

I think being clear on what we don't want is much easier, don't you, Lexi? And yet focusing on what we do want is so helpful. I return to one of my favourite questions, "What would you rather have?" xo

The Gardener Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 5:39pm

For many years I've used a programme called 'Paradox' for data-base work. Thought I'd strayed into a Paradox with your blog, Lex. What disobedient things our brains and thoughts are. Mine needs the old-fashioned cure for lies, equivalent of washing mouth out with soap and water. However many interesting things I have to think about I dwell on the current grouse to the exclusion of all else - makes me mad. On Radio 4 Women's Hour this morning a lady in her 50's (this week's theme) was talking about her husband in a wheelchair. Tomorrow it's coping with depression! It ties up with my inability to corral my thoughts, because this lady's husband was prescribed blood pressure pills, did not obey his doctor, and had a stroke. So, really, in what is still the 'prime' of life she has an invalid to cope with for life, and it was not necessary. Her story has left me storming because I'm coping with the same - Mr G had macular degeneration 8 years ago - treated rapidly with everything modern. Family, friends and professionals rushed in with the most modern gadgets, he had a session of re-adjustment to the new sight (with an excellent professional). He rebuffed the lot, often rudely - all doctors don't understand. I've tried an excellent psychotherapist - 'you and your gurus'. Another incident, when he refused to do a thing I said resulted in a fall and the loss of sight in the right eye. So, he is a 'poor old man', but life could have been better than this. So, like the lady on the radio, I go round being angry, and I think we are people who want to help, and not be angry. So, hope it is pertinent - focus on what you want - which is to live my life to the fullest possible regardless of the restraints. But I wish somebody would take the anger and hostility away. Mr G has come through the glass partition three times while I write this - in perpetual moan mode. ooooH. I must not break any more china, I need it Saturday. Different tack - people go under the radar from time to time - Leah is conspicuous by her absence. Goodye, Leah, hope life is 'good' with you. From the ace moaner.Just re-read your blog, Lex, wish life was a simple equation.

Leah Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 8:35pm

Gardner, Thanks for thinking of me.I feel so humble that with all your problems you have time to think of me. I am here, just don't comment all the time but read and observe. Your comment to day as always is so detailed and honest and moving and makes me think. When I read your words I dont feel anger or hostitility more frustration and incredible determination. Take care Gardener and keep on keeping on. I don't see you as a moaner rather an honest voice for the many in a similar situation who don't have the words or a voice.

Nicco Mon, Nov 28th 2016 @ 8:29pm

I've been focusing on something for the last 34yrs - it hasn't happened yet! I continue to focus and pray...

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