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Crossing the Line (The Double Yellow one!) Monday October 31, 2016

There is was. Parked. Gorgeous. Luxurious. Ostentatious. Opulent. Sumptuous. Expensive. Really Expensive...

Then a random stranger stopped and gave me the hind-lick manoeuvre and I spat out the thesaurus I'd clearly just swallowed and got on with the story...

It was a most beautiful Bentley. A car of such elegance. With a very witty personalised number plate. This was someone who had 'arrived'.

Not only had they arrived.

They had parked.

On a double yellow line!

On a bend!!

How do you feel about this guy – for a guy it was?

We shall call him 'Mason' – for that was what his number plate may have declared.

Me? I felt angry.

I'd been ill all week.

Deprived of sleep.

I was a tad bitter.

I wanted to key his car.

And here was this rich parker plonked without a care – completely disregarding the rules as if they didn't apply to him.

So I took a picture and stuck it on Instagram and Facebook.

What a knob.

I am.

I mean.

I'm mean.

Why was the problem with me?

Well, firstly, he then came out of a shop and I recognised him – a chap I thought was pretty OK actually.

Secondly, it was me who was the felon.

I was bitter. Twisted. And then I found the root... I was jealous. I was a robber – robbing my heart of joy... and sending it's blood pressure up in the process.

I was jealous that he was 'free' and I wasn't.

If he got a parking ticket, he had a roll of high currency notes that he could pay it off with on the spot (yes, I've seen him and his uncle pull out a wedge of cash, just like in the movies.) It would mean nothing to him. It wasn't that he didn't care – it was that it simply didn't matter to him in the grand scheme of things.

Have you ever noticed the really nice cars parked in the front of the hotels? You know, the ones parked even closer than the disabled bays? Why is this? It's because they've elevated their game to such a level that it's really not the same game. They actually don't play by the same rules as you and me because it isn't the same game. Hey, he doesn't even pay tax... probably... just his tax advisor.

So here's my thought for today. I don't want to be the jealous guy (even if that is such a cool song). I want to play a new game. I want to raise the level of my game. I want to cross the line... I want to cross the lines that have been holding me back...

...even if they are the double yellow ones.

A Moodscope member.

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment below.

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Sally Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 6:32am

Really interesting point you've raised there, Lex. My reaction would've been entirely the same and I love the way you unravelled the reasons behind this reaction and feelings of gives me loads to ponder. Very much enjoyed your story of actually seeing who was in the car too, because however aggrieved we feel about a person's insensitive actions, there is also the person behind the action to be evaluated, and often, they are OK people. I have to keep in mind that saying about one bad thing doesn't make a bad person,....I can't quite recall exactly how it goes, but it's true that I/ we demonise people instead of the act. Thanks for getting the grey matter going early this Monday morning, Lex. Always excellent you are at this. :-) Sally

Lex Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 7:13am

Thanks, Sally. Felt like a 'switch' point for me. I'm seeing how many lines I can cross today!!! :-)

DAVE Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 7:03am

Hi Lex,
very shallow this world has become, their is jealousy, envy, anger, despondency, which can lead to flouting the law, and more trouble.

Now, I'm not against wealth, I'm quite comfortable within myself, but if we 'Worship' money, then it will take us down a path leading to misery, and depression.

We need to Free ourselves....Find contentment in, for example the beauty of this world that we have been given and placed upon...The colours, birds of different types, flowers, trees, shrubs, the different types of sky, sunrises and sunsets..These are REAL, natural everlasting.

These wealthy people, have either conned others into their web of deceit, or they have worked really hard to gain their success, or they have inherited it....Which either way they have obtained this their wealth...There is something that links these three types...That is ORDER, personal order in their lives.

I keep banging on about order, procrastination, keeping YOUR space clean and tidy, your home, finances, health, as in healthy appetite, relationships, NEVER allowing ourselves to be come OFFENDED, always smoothing over contentious situations, without becomming a doormat. HONEST with ourselves, and others, going WITHOUT to CLEAR the credit card debt, and aiming through hard work to clear all debt, even A Mortgage, HONEST ALL in thought, Word and Deed.

Once we have this whole ORDER thing and routine in our lives, our own attitude will CHANGE......I promise it will revolutionize our thought pattern, it will teach us to stand on our own two feet and GOVERN our thoughts, words, and Deeds. Governing ourselves, gives complete independance....

Once that is achieved, we are able to close our front door on the world, which ATTRACTS the kind of CONTENTMENT, which escapes a lot of the general public who are caught up in this fashionable world of material make believe, spending money on fashionable 'JUNK' feeding the likes of THE BENTLY driver....Lex don't become a 'Lemming' going over the cliff to your DEMISE...Rise above them, and get on with sorting out the mess to which you may have found yourself...Please don't take it personally, because it is only my opinion.
But I am very the Beauty around me, I have a God who loves both you and I, financially I have sufficient for my needs. But wealth beyond measure in the simple things of life that are not man made.
I have all the latest gadgets, but they are only things which oil the wheels of this mortal sojourn.

BUT I have a very precious GIFT the gift of CONTENTMENT, and I live in the 'NOW'....
God Bless.


Lex Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 7:14am

Godliness with contentment is great gain, Dave. Here's to great gain, eh? Have a good one :-)

Brum Mum Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 7:04am

A fabulous insight into jealousy and how we perceive other people. Your reaction was human and justified-why should Mason break the rules? But I know that you normally operate by a different set of values, where a Bentley may not be that important in the scheme of things. I too often perceive others are having a more fun, better time than me but actually I have forgotten in the fog of green envy that there are thousands more in far worse circumstances. I will read this again. Thank you.

Lex Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 7:16am

Thanks Brum Mum. Coming into the Studio this morning for the Breakfast Show, I heard the news about the poor folks in Italy. Really shifted my focus (yet again). I tell you what, I've had so may shifts of perception over the last couple of months, I must have Chameleon Consciousness! :-)

Tutti Frutti Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 8:23am

Hi Lex I totally understand your reaction - a posh car on a double yellow parked somewhere dangerous like a bend would wind me up as well. Thankfully this is the only social media I do! I also agree with you and with Sally that one bad action doesn't make a bad person. Incidentally it's what you get taught in parenting books about praise/ show disapproval of the action not the child. And I can see what you say about the parking fine not being much of a disincentive to the rich as well.

I don't agree that they should go ahead and park on double yellow lines though, as the yellow lines are generally there for good reasons about safety/ convenience of others. If the rich want to gamble by not buying pay and display tickets in car parks that's their business (and they'll probably pay roughly the same as the rest of us anyway) but I don't think anyone should do something that has a negative effect on others. Not that I manage to live up to this of course - let he who is without sin cast the first stone.

So good luck with breaking the boundaries that are holding you back provided that it isn't at others expense. (I can't imagine you doing that anyway Lex.) Love TF x

Lex Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 3:46pm

We are in alignment, Dear Tutti Frutti (who I visualise in a Tutu!!!) My intention with this one is not to praise the naughty boy, for naughty boy he is. He was a thoughtful naughty boy though in that he parked on the visible part of the bend on a one-way system, so he didn't actually inconvenience anyone. Not that I'm justifying him - and I won't be following his example. No, my point was to realise the negative spiral of jealousy, resentment and malice. These are nasties that I'd hoped were no longer a part of my life... Ho hum... at least I spotted them and gave THEM a ticket!!! Love to you too x

Tutti Frutti Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 7:50pm

Lex I love the idea of Tutti Frutti in a tutu. The words sound excellent. I am not and never have been a ballerina though. I worked out that it wasn't for me aged 5 because I really was that bad. You'd better think of me as a fairy heffalump in that tutu perhaps it will give you some vitamin L to help you through. Weirdly the dancing genes seem to have emerged from nowhere though and my daughter is really good and loves it! Sorry to see from your comments below that you are having difficulty at the moment. Well done for writing the blog and I am glad that paddling helped. Hang in there. Love TF x

Tutti Frutti Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 8:26am

PS The negative labels for yourself seem to have rolled off the page awfully quickly. I hope you can manage to be a bit more forgiving to yourself.

Lex Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 3:47pm

Not in the best of spaces at the moment, in all honesty...

LP Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 8:33am

Hi Lex,
I can identify with this in the workplace. I have bubbled with anger about having more and more work being dished on to an already full workload by someone who doesn't do it themselves, you know, the Royal "We"! Agggh! ...and breathe! :)
In this case, I wouldn't want to be in that position, but it has me how much resistence and anger I have had about things I can't change and only end up hurting myself with negative feelings.
I'm pretty much a live and let live person generally, but when MY boundaries have been crossed it's been a very different story!
Maybe we need a release for it, rather than beat our selves up about it. Feel it, allow ourselves to yell about it in a safe way. Then move on :))
Sorry if I've wound anyone up, I have myself a bit so a good chance to practice letting it go, release it and let it drift away, time for tea and some calming thoughts!
I'll have a ponder about the possiblity of crossing the line so that I'm not that person in the first place!
Great blog Lex, love and peace to all, LP xx

Lex Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 3:48pm

I tell you what, dear LP xx, I've had fun crossing lines today. Hopefully, I'll finish the day with some cross-dressing!!! Well it is Halloween! xx

Jul Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 8:59am

Hi Lex. I would feel anger too, a sense of injustice actually at the huge wealth gap there is in the UK and globally. I wouldn't feel jealousy however. Mason probably wanted more than his Bentley. The fact that he parked where everyone could see his car meant he craved admiration. He'll be looking for a yacht next or a bigger yacht if he already has one. No I am not jealous of wealth. Yes I would like another property somewhere warm for the winter but I know if I got this, the excitement would soon pall. I don't consider Mason to be free at all. He is probably consumed by the trappings of wealth. But you know all this Lex! I would be interested to know how you intend to up your game and cross the line. Maybe you will tell us next week? Jules xx

Lex Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 3:52pm

Hi Jules... well, I'm making great progress today. I've been very poorly, and am under lots of pressure. Plus, this week is madness epitomised in terms of the commitments I've made. So today, after yet another prolonged coughing fit, I pressed pause. I crossed the 'Ought' line, vaulted over the 'Should' hurdle, and jumped well clear of the 'Must' pit. I took off my shoes and I paddled on the beach at Boscombe... ...for hours. I couldn't 'afford' to do this, but it was the best paddle EVER. And the result was that I got to meet Sam the Terrier who inspired a blog on LinkedIn.

Lex Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 3:52pm


Sally Tue, Nov 1st 2016 @ 8:50am

Fantastic way of coping, Lex! Well done, you! I am going to rush & read your blog about Sam the Tertier because I do like dogs and their positivity the writing.

the room above the garage Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 10:36am

You made me laugh at 6am by use of the word 'knob' :-) Ten out of ten as it's a word I use and makes me laugh every time :-D Let's pity him, as he cannot see the wood for the trees. You're not a jealous guy (love that song!) you just had a moment that we all would (parking on double yellows is a BIG bug bear of mine) and I wonder if there's something else making you feel ruffled. Look inside lovely boy. Love ratg x.

Lex Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 3:53pm

Oh RATG, I don't have to look far. My life is unravelling as we speak. This as a spill over of many unresolved issues. "BIG Issue?" That may be my next cry for help, but I can't see for the tears...

Sally Tue, Nov 1st 2016 @ 8:51am

Big, big, virtual hugs, dear Lex. You are always there for us & we will always be here for you. X

Mary Wednesday Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 10:49am

Love your honestly and love the humour - I would have liked to have seen that hind-lick manoeuvre! I think my eyes are burning at the mere thought. (Incidentally - I heard the other day that the, now very elderly Professor Heimlich, was recently able to perform his technique personally when a fellow resident at his nursing home choked at the meal table. What a claim to fame, eh - to have been given the Heimlich manoeuvre by the Prof himself!)
Regarding wealth - I worked for a couple of years in a very exclusive Kensington hairdressers. It took just two weeks for me to realise that the extremely wealthy have exactly the same problems and issues as we "normal" people. Wealth gives you more choices, that's all. You still only have 24 hours in the day and the most important thing in life is still your loved ones, not possessions.

Lex Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 3:55pm

Sounds like a lovely bit of PR for my new company, WealthCoach! lol. 5 wealths of which a wealth-of-connections is the most important. Again, we are aligned!

Another Sally Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 5:01pm

That kind of parking just makes me unreasonably angry. In my town the other day I saw a car parked on the zig zag lines next to a pedestrian crossing. I was standing over the road, gaping in disbelief, when the driver came out of a charity shop and fetched another item from the boot. He saw my look. I said "it's a zig zag line". His response, "I'm taking stuff to the charity shop", like that was a permissible reason for breaking the rules. Fuming.
I pay to park and lug my bags to the charity shop. Not being righteous, just law abiding.

Lex Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 5:34pm

I know Sally... I know... we do the same. I'd like to type rude words...

The Gardener Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 8:37pm

Rang lots of bells, Lex - and, Another Sally, it's the law that counts. I'm not jealouse of the possessions, but to use money power and notoriety to make a mockery of the law always gets me.

S Mon, Oct 31st 2016 @ 10:41pm

Thank you Lex for sharing. I really empathise with you on this. Sending you get well soon vibes too, Sx

Julie Wed, Nov 2nd 2016 @ 7:52am

Beautifully written Lex. And perfectly concluded. So long as we allow the behaviour, words and actions of others to dictate how we feel ourselves, we will never be free. I call it 'carrying my own weather'. It's easy to condemn and criticise but it never makes us feel as good as forgiveness does - both being forgiven for our own failings and giving it to others for theirs. Keep inspiring us! :)

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