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Coming out of the dark. Tuesday December 2, 2014

A few weeks ago I embarked on a new part of my current journey. I attended a short course for people who are in my current situation. It was an amazing experience as I met seven other people, all of whom are in a similar situation, going through similar struggles and facing similar challenges. All of us had in common the fact that for many years we have all felt incredibly isolated.

As the course progressed the bonding of the group intensified. Being able to talk freely without fear of judgement and to know that there was such a depth of understanding was a profound experience. Without exception, this was the first time we had shared our stories with other people (outside of a counselling room). It was emotional, empowering, and validating.

Leaving the course and returning to reality felt daunting. I was wobbly for a little while after. I felt exposed and vulnerable, having shared my deepest thoughts, insecurities, my secrets. Going our separate ways felt like the protective bubble we had been in had been burst. Yet the truth was, these people now belonged in my life and were a part of my reality. We had formed a new support network that we could turn to when needed.

Some of us met again the other day. And just the sight of each other caused the tears in each of us to flow. I woke up the following morning and sat in my new friends garden. It was raining (I don't do rain!) and it felt magical. As I took in the beauty of the flowers, the sound of the rain, the feeling of the water, the smell of the garden I had an overwhelming sense of peace. A heavy burden is being lifted through the sharing of our lives and the learning we are encountering. The difference in each of us, in just a few short weeks was staggering.

We are all at different stages, facing difficult decisions but the one thing we are all doing, for the first time in a very long time, is focusing on nurturing ourselves. It is never too late to start that. I am so thankful for finding the courage to push past my fear and showing my vulnerabilities. I have found my voice and I no longer feel constrained by being alone.

This world is a very big place and somewhere out there is someone else who knows exactly where you are at. None of us are ever truly alone.

A Moodscope member.

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Anonymous Tue, Dec 2nd 2014 @ 5:43am

Thanks Rosie. You have described the paradox of vulnerability. I tell my clients that it is through the sharing of our vulnerability that belonging and community is built. When I made this discovery I spent nearly 8 hours a week in some type of support group or activity. I became the sponge for support I remain today. Welcome home. Revu2

The Entertrainer Tue, Dec 2nd 2014 @ 8:40am

We all need to find at least one person with whom we can share who we really are, what we really feel, believe, and, especially, what we fear. Even us introverts need a sense of connection with someone who we know really 'gets' us - and still loves us. Even better if they still like us! I am so glad you've found a group of people who 'get' you Rosie.

Anonymous Tue, Dec 2nd 2014 @ 10:26am

It's really good to hear each new part of your journey Rosie. What an immense amount of change and learning you're going through. Brilliant stuff!
Lex, I agree with your comment but I don't practice it. I do a little but in very limited ways. I tried sharing and got horribly burnt. Sharing possibly broke my relationship of 20 plus years. Then I tried to share again with someone much more understanding but got tangled in a messy web and it nearly pulled me under again. Currently I work my survival around not sharing because its the only way I can survive. I hope it will change again. Having seen that written down I now need to empty out some tears. All good. All good. Kettle time. Love ratg :-)

Anonymous Tue, Dec 2nd 2014 @ 10:26am

Lovely thank you Rosie, finding people who understand you is the most wonderful and liberating thing isn't it. And an utterly vital part of life and wellness. I wish you all the best for this new phase in your life. Amyx

Anonymous Tue, Dec 2nd 2014 @ 12:47pm

Thank you, Rosie. I empathise with the sense of isolation. Finding people who are open enough to share their innermost is a healing experience. I also have just learned to nurture myself. It is a rocky road we are on. The feeling of a net of support helps me. Lesley

Anonymous Tue, Dec 2nd 2014 @ 12:53pm

remember our Lord said that he would never leave us nor forsake us,and that He is always there for us,love to you

Anonymous Tue, Dec 2nd 2014 @ 6:59pm

Thank you Rosie! Hooray for this group!

Anonymous Tue, Dec 2nd 2014 @ 7:59pm

Yea peer support!!!! We are holding a training to certify "Peer Specialist" in our building right now. I am a Certified Peer Specialist. We are our own best answers! No body can share and be there for you like somebody who has been there before.
Many counties are finding that when we measure the effects of peer support it is as beneficial as other treatments especially when used in conjunction with other provider treatments.
Go us!!
I'm glad you found some solace, encouragement, and the power to carry support to others.
Blessings to you.

Anonymous Tue, Dec 2nd 2014 @ 9:12pm

Hello, I really don't mean to intrude but could someone please tell me what these groups are all about? And how do you find out where they are?

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