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14

April


Can I Show and Be Me? Thursday April 14, 2016

Another week over,
Another day through.
How did I do,
Have I been true?

Did I weaken and follow,
The crowd on the street.
Did I loose me,
Was I simply discrete?

Did I fear losing,
The support that I have,
By being authentic.
Did I cut me in half?

Did I fear falling,
Back down again,
After getting up,
And feeling sane?

Did I fear stumbling,
Over my own thoughts.
To lose myself,
In a whole bunch of oughts?

Yet for me to be 'whole',
I need to be me.
I need courage to see,
How I can be free.

Free of these thoughts,
That endlessly flow,
Round my mind,
And fill me with woe.

Free of the stigma,
That I may feel,
From society around,
That looks may reveal.

Can I accept,
that I simply have an illness,
Like so many others,
And life is just thus?

If I try and hide it away,
It will likely stay.
Like the secrets we have,
That hold our feet in clay.

I need the courage,
To show the real me.
Not drift through life,
Like a bottle in the sea.

Then people can see,
And feel who I am.
And I'll not be closed,
Tight as a clam.

I can only love others,
As much as I love myself.
Can I love me,
Hidden up on the shelf?

We want the world to be real,
We want people to be true,
How can I help,
If I keep me out of view?

Les
A Moodscope member.

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment below.


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Comments

Zareen Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 7:04am

Hi Les, thanks for your blog. You echo my thoughts exactly. How can we accept others when we don't always accept ourselves but I find it an ongoing process.

Les Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 9:00am

Hi Zareen - always an ongoing process of self discovery and acceptance.

Richard Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 8:33am

Les, I love the bottle in the sea metaphor.
Have a fine day.
Peace & Love,
Richard.

Les Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 9:01am

Hi Richard - thanks and a fine day to you my man.

silvia Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 8:55am

Beautiful poem, Les. I can relate.

Les Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 9:02am

Hi Silvia - Great that you can relate / Great that it can flow / From me to you / Watch how you go.

Les Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 9:02am

Hi Silvia - Great that you can relate / Great that it can flow / From me to you / Watch how you go.

The Gardener Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 9:28am

Good morning Les. 'did I fear falling back down again'. Oh dear, yes. Classic symptoms of my depression many years ago - terror of getting out of bed and facing the day - flipping at two dirty cups on the draining board. But - found reason - reaction - people came to see house for sale yesterday - couldn't but it - but 3 hours of 'normality', our 'types' modern languages, English literature, travel, books garden lovers - they went, and I went into decline.

The Gardener Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 9:30am

But I do have the cheerful nurses to face Mr G's morning miseries. I polished my draining board, and went and pinched some golden tulips from the neighbour's garden (elderly, away, never go out anyway). Marvellous drying day - so copied gypsies and draped washing over everything. Now, while gung-ho attitude remains will attack finances.

Mary Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 9:37am

Bless you Gardener, with your stolen golden daffodils and your washing draped over bushes (may it smell of the wonderful outdoors when you bring it in) I always get such a sensual feast with your comments!

Mary Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 9:39am

Sorry - tulips! I meant tulips and then the fingers slipped into cliché! Sorry!

Les Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 9:41am

Hi TG - always good to hear your positive moves......keep going.

Mary Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 9:38am

Hi Les - I loved this poem. Can I love myself hidden up on the shelf? Yes indeed. Very hard to be authentic and risk rejection all the time. Every blessing on you!

Les Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 9:43am

Hi Mary - Aye 'hard' to risk rejection.....harder and more dangerous not to risk.......ALL personal development and growth takes place outside our comfort zone.

Angela Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 10:30am

Thank you for your poem Les, so much of it resonates with me; very helpful. :)

Les Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 10:33am

Hi Angela - glad to be of assistance.

Frankie Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 12:34pm

Wow Les! The "a" word! Challenging stuff ... "Can I accept that ... life is just thus" The toughest part for me is that this is a daily choice. On the plus side, it does get easier to make that choice, with continued practice ... . /"If I try and hide it away,
It will likely stay.
Like the secrets we have,
That hold our feet in clay." This is SO true for me ... I am Really Good at choosing avoidance over acceptance. Frankie

Les Thu, Apr 14th 2016 @ 12:46pm

Hi Frankie - Maybe time then to choose acceptance....and break that old habit.......??? :-)

Anonymous Wed, Apr 20th 2016 @ 2:29am

I loved reading this poem.

I have a question about one stanza, too:

> Can I accept,
> that I simply have an illness,
> Like so many others,
> And life is just thus?

Is this meant in the sense that we all have an illness, such as self-doubt and insecurities, as described by the lines in the poem? Or, is it meant in the sense that to feel what the poem describes is to suffer from an illness, such as an emotional disorder, as many others do?

I ask because this poem resonated with me, and though I'm unaware of my suffering from an emotional disorder, I'm wondering if I should get checked out :)


Liane Thu, Apr 21st 2016 @ 7:38am

You write that others have illnesses. Yes, many others too must deal with illnesses daily. I hope I continue to define me as what I believe and what I do, not what the illnesses makes me. I run my life and I will not be defined by any illness. I keep my illness in the background, deal with it, and move ahead. Thank you for sharing another well-written poem.

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