Moodscope's blog

22

September


Bend and not break. Monday September 22, 2014

Does anyone remember Camberwick Green? It wasn't that long ago so I don't think I'm showing my inner dinosaurus but I will always be happy to be corrected. Anyway, for those who don't know it, due to being shiny and not craggy, or for those who grew up miles away from the isles, it was a British TV children's show that aired in the 70's. Looking back, the beginning and ending of each episode was perhaps slightly creepy in its slow, pronounced tone combined with scary clown puppet, but I found it utterly magical as a child. It began with a little music box which would turn and open and out would come the character whose story was to be told that day...

"Here is a box, a musical box, wound up and ready to play, but this box can hide a secret inside, can you guess what's in it today?"

It was this that came to my mind's eye when some very useful comments on the blogspot reminded us that our experiences of depression are not the same. This is a huge benefit to us all. If we were experiencing the same anxieties, confusions, lethargies, anger, energy extremes or rewinds, blackness or blinding lights, numbness or searingly sensitive feelings (to name just a few) then we might be herded up like Daleks and fired from the galaxy.

We are different in our depressions and this is a fantastic thing. I struggle with anxiety but I didn't have a clue...I only stumbled over it through Moodscope. I thought I was 'just' depressed and that it came in a singular lump of a package. My deep-seated, gnawing, clawing, grumble of anger only wore a badge once I heard others talking of their anxiety. Being a high-feeling kind of a person, I wanted to kiss these people on the cheek (whether they wished for my slobbering or not!) such was my relief at understanding myself a little more. Now I know, I have started to size it up, try loving it, try being disciplined with it, try killing it with kindness and batting my (twitching) eyelashes at it in the hope it might give me an afternoon off now and again.

My point is this. Moodscope is, for me, my beautiful, magical, musical box. Each time I receive my email is like an opening sequence on Camberwick Green. Who will I meet today? What will I learn from them? Who can I stick out my hand for and help cross the stream? We are not Daleks and neither is life as simple as Camberwick Green, but we can learn to bend and not break when we share.

Love from

The room above the garage.
A Moodscope member.


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Comments

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 7:12am

Good morning RATG; your blog is perceptive and made me laugh as well. A double whammy on Monday morning. Thanks :-)

Les Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 7:13am

In box No 1 is the Scottish Highlander who is presently sitting looking out at the Alps over Lake Geneva......

Lovely stuff as always from RATG......that can take us into a 'different' box - taste - smell - touch - sound - view - a sense of wonder that we are all as unique as our fingerprints.

What other 'boxes' will appear today ........to enrich our lives.......wherever we are mentally and physically......even spiritually.....thanks to Moodscope

"Each of us makes his own weather, determines the colour of the skies in the emotional universe which he inhabits." Fulton J. Sheen (and we all struggle at times......as well)

Rupert Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 8:10am

Isnt it amazing that for so many of us that small piece of our childhood lives with us forever - I can even hear the voice of the narrator now - mysterious but kindly and interesting to listen to and definitey caught your attention. I often think back to those times and try and remember how I felt then and in some ways it wasn't very different to now. Sorry for rambling!

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 9:00am

Much enjoyed this, beautifully worded too. Your warmth shines through like a beacon RATG

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 9:05am

Wonderful words!! I like that, Les!
Geneva was my home town when little! I can see you now ....

jackie Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 12:10pm

Thankyou for making me smile this morning. I remember the programme very well it takes me back....

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 12:25pm

A wonderful reflection about how we can grapple with our illness.....my depression is a silent stranger that walks with me but has almost become a unwanted friend, and knowing that I can challenge the emotions I feel and learn to live with them and understand more through other's reflections such as yours, RATG, is deeply comforting....

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 2:18pm

Thank you for those replies, it's wonderful to hear feedback, good or bad, to know each of you a little more!

I felt a falling shift in mood this last week and gave myself a surprise this morning when I opened my email :-) It was a good reminder that writing is cathartic for me. And thank you for taking time to comment.
Love from the ratg.

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 2:20pm

:-)

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 2:23pm

Les, it's great that you are looking out at Lake Geneva! That sounds like you have moved forward very much and is very good to hear.

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 2:24pm

Brian Cant. And he has a very reassuring voice I feel. You didn't ramble :-)

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 2:26pm

:-)

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 2:29pm

I loved Mrs Honeyman's dress...how she just glided within it, without any legs.

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 2:31pm

Wow. Great!

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 3:05pm

Thank for many me smile too this morning, I love the way you have written this and it brought back many happy memories. They way you have compared it to life's ups and downs and the feelings and emotions that come with it, has hit a chord with me and it has described it beautifully. My moodscope emails does the same for me - its not very often I comment (as I'm not that brave) - but I just had to say 'thanks' and look forward to who or what I may meet today from my 'music box'......and Camberwick Green :)

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 4:00pm

Anon 3.05, clearly you are that brave! And I hope you feel good that you did, pleased to meet you x. I read for a long, long time before I ever dared comment. It's less scary than people may think. Sometimes just one little comment is all it takes to feel you are not alone...and that can be day-changing. Welcome!

Theresa NZ Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 4:46pm

Thank you RATG. I agree the more we share about our different struggles the more we feel less alone. I was researching bipolar disorder and came across Premenstrual Dysphoria Disorder PMDD and WOW it was a lifechanger for me!! (I do have bipolar tendencies as well - how I deal with my emotions). The more we know, the more we can manage. Thank you, and thanks to all the bloggers and commenters. I related to the anonymous comment regarding depression as an 'unwanted friend' a very good description.

AJ Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 4:47pm

Since reading the email this morning I've had the theme music going through my head. Its been a calming "ear worm" playing quietly throughout the day. Thanks.

Mary Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 4:49pm

Ah, love you too, RATG! What a lovely image. I just missed Camberwick Green as we didn't have a television until quite a bit later (ee, we wuz poor, but honest), but as Rupert says, those childhood images stay with us (watching Dr Who from behind the sofa anyone? And I the time I thought I was the only one who did that!). So, so pleased you are writing for Moodscope.

Lex McKee Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 5:28pm

That's because she was a vampyr

Lex McKee Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 5:31pm

Hey, Camberwick Green was magic (and our friends on various sides of various ponds can get a taste via YouTube...) BUT I must declare that I look forward far more to a new series. It will be called, "The Room Above the Garage"... and some of the ideas have already been aired.
Every episode, a gorgeous voice will say, "And can you guess what's in the Garage today?"
Let the episodes roll.................................

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 6:15pm

Yes even though our depressions have differences, they also have some similar characteristics as well. Mine seems to be a deep emptiness inside -- a hollow feeling or hole within me that is so vacant and void. This is often accompanied by anxious feelings and some foreboding...does this sound familiar at all to anyone? And how do you combat it on a day to day basis..Like the prior blogs mentioned, the more we know the better armed we will be..thanks for any insights..Dave

heather Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 6:16pm

Dear room above the garage. Ever since I started reading Moodscope the room above the garage caught my imagination - up in the tree tops with birds singing and lots of pot plants on the window sills ! I so enjoyed your blog RATG and would like to repeat what ANother said: Your warmth always shines through like a beacon. Love from Heather xx

heather Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 6:19pm

Great idea Lex !

heather Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 6:34pm

I am not sure whether this will help Dave, but I would say that anxiety and foreboding are like squatters waiting to inhabit that hollow place. I find that anything I look at which I find beautiful, any music I hear which I find lovely, every thought I have which is happy or loving, every idea which is positive and every job I do which I enjoy etc. etc. will (very) gradually help to fill the hole and push the squatters out. But I do have to work at it.

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 9:51pm

I see it all differently now :-D

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 9:55pm

Hi Theresa, I must look that one up...very curious as it's a new one on me and I'm always interested. 'Unwanted friend' hits home with me too. Love ratg.

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 9:56pm

Brilliant! I think this has to be comment of the day! :-D

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 10:03pm

Aw thank you Mary-doll and yes to Dr Who! I hid behind my granny's TV until I realised the Daleks were IN IT :-O

(Much sleep lost...skidded into depression...here we are ;-)

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 10:06pm

Oh Lex, every life needs you! That's hilarious...now, I will start drawing up a short list of who can play each of us. Let the daydreams commence!

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 10:22pm

Hi Dave, I agree with Heather that it is often learning to 'flip' the emptiness that helps. May I ask...what is your self worth like? Can you praise yourself in any way? Can you feel proud of yourself? I find emptiness comes from feeling, and believing, that my contribution to the world is minute, that I have nothing to give and do not wish to receive. That equals empty. By working out more about what actually makes me feel my value, I can do more of it. I'm currently picking my way through but even one small moment when you 'feel' you mattered makes a whole world of difference and starts to fill the void. Love from the ratg.

Anonymous Mon, Sep 22nd 2014 @ 10:41pm

Oh Heather you've made me glow, what a lovely thing to say. Currently holding myself together from bursting from the giggle about the room being in treetops with plants. I'm SURE I could win a prize and possibly set a record for the speed I can kill plants...it's NEVER intended but it's the one area I can't be trusted!!

Lex McKee Tue, Sep 23rd 2014 @ 8:12am

Well, if we're choosing characters AND getting to dress up...

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