Becoming a "BUT" Watcher.

Saturday April 23, 2016

Susan Scott in her book, "Fierce Conversations" suggests that "Our work, our relationships, our lives, succeed or fail gradually, then suddenly, one conversation at a time".

This is a conversation that by definition we need to have with ourselves first, before we take it to the world.

The inner critic may be holding us back from having a real conversation that builds a good, compassionate, mindful, kindly relationship with ourselves. Fear is what constrains us for the most part from taking this conversation to the world.

Language is the only thing we humans have to create our own reality. John. B. Keane, a famous Irish playwright once said that "Words have personalities". So often one word can at best limit and at worst completely close down possibilities and lock us in. "I know I should BUT...", "I know it makes sense BUT..." and so on. The current story goes "You're right BUT..."

Today, just try a little experiment. Today, become a "BUT" watcher. Notice how your "BUT" might be getting in the way, and holding you back from exploring the unique richness of your own potential, your own life, your own world.

Beginning to develop the skills of conversation could be as simple as replacing that one word with "AND"

The NEW story goes - "I know I should AND...", "I know it makes sense AND...", "You're right AND..." and so on.

The conversation is about the words you choose. You can always change those words and change the conversation, even learn a new conversation. The conversation is also about the relationship you choose with yourself, the world and those in it.

SLOW DOWN today and choose your words carefully and mindfully, because the conversation you choose is the relationship.

A Moodscope member.

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment below.


Comments are viewable only by members. Register Now to participate in the discussion.

Already have an account? Login to leave a comment.

There are 15 comments so far.

What is Moodscope?

Moodscope members seek to support each other by sharing their experiences through this blog. If you’d like to receive these daily posts by email, just sign up to Moodscope now, completely free of charge.

Moodscope is an innovative way for people to treat their own low mood problems using an engaging online tool. Anyone in the world can accurately assess and track daily mood scores over a period of time. We have proved that the very act of measuring, tracking and sharing mood can actually lift it. Join now.

Blog Archive


Posts and comments on the Moodscope blog are the personal views of Moodscope members, they are for informational purposes only and do not constitute medical advice. Moodscope makes no representations as to the accuracy or completeness of any information on this blog or found by following any of the links.

Moodscope will not be liable for any errors or omissions in this information nor for the availability of this information. The owner will not be liable for any losses, injuries, or damages from the display or use of this information.