Moodscope's blog

19

October


Admit, Emit or Omit? Monday October 19, 2015

[To listen to Lex's audio version of this blog click here: https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/blog-admit-emit-omit]

"How are you?" The truth is not always welcome here.

For many people, asking, "How are you?" is mere punctuation to aid the flow of conversation. There are certain phrases that are like warm up shots in a game of tennis. They are not the real thing.

For these types, it is best to omit the truth. However, you can tell a truth without compromise. Instead of saying, "I'm fine" (which for me means, "I'm about as low as I can get!") or the even worse, "Not too bad" (very English), I say the honest, "I'm doing good, thank you!" This wonderfully ambiguous phrase is my truth. Every day, even the worst days, I still seek to do a little bit of good for some other soul. (Yes, I'm a righteous dude, I know!!!) Of course, the listener reads this as I'm OK, but that's OK, isn't it?

For others, they need you to play a role. Some are not ready for the truth. They need you to be amazing or at least OK. A good example is children. So the, "I'm doing good, thank you!" answer works well for them too, but needs a little extra magic. This is where I think we need to emit the 'truth'. Emit means to discharge something, especially radiation. My children and my grandchildren, and my listeners to my radio shows, need me to emit positivity, hope, sparkle. While this hasn't always been my practice and sometimes seems impossible, it is always my intention. Like a cheetah running, I can usually manage short bursts before needing to recharge!

And then there are the rare few who welcome the truth. When I ask you, "How are you?" I want the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I want you to put your hand on a metaphorical bible and in the court of love, tell me how you really are. Why? Because I am genuinely interested in your well-being.

And by "I" I mean "Moodscope" - we are genuinely interested in your well-being. That's what our blog support structure is for - to help you deal with your truth.

In this small, safe environment, it is safe to admit the truth - it's welcome here because you are welcome here.

So, how are you today?

Lex
A Moodscope member.

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment below.


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Comments

Ann Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 1:28am

Just thought I'd say hello, in an interested to hear how you all are way.
A special hello to The Gardener, and others suffering sleep disruption - I just caught up with yesterday's blog...
And myself? Thank you for asking... "not too bad" is my usual, but "I'm doing good, thank you" is a great answer.... Since becoming unwell and now as I bob up and down, , I have come to hate our habitual "how are you?" in the UK, and the dishonesty I feel in answering "fine" or similar. I suppose the real dishonesty is in the off-hand asking. Maybe I can feel less bothered if I feel those folks only deserve the superficial answer...
Anyway, thank you Lex!

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 6:14am

Glad it was helpful, Ann... and "doing good" can be therapeutic in so many ways! L'xx

Debs Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 7:38am

Great blog Lex!! And perfect timing as I was wrestling with this exact point yesterday. I met a couple of friends with whom I feel deeply uncomfortable discussing my feelings (and in that I realise I may need to review the label of 'friend' but that's a while other discussion!) I have talked to them in the past and have had no empathy - probably because empathy involves getting into the same space as the person feeling the pain and holding their hand - an uncomfortable place for many people, especially those unable to face their own pain. So I now choose not to talk about how I'm feeling with them as vulnerability (in my opinion) needs to be earned and I can only be vulnerable with people I completely trust to hold me and sit wirh me in the dark without the temptation to immediately 'turn on the light' or offer a quick fix.

So, this creates a dilemma... I'm not in a good place but don't want to discuss (with them). But neither do I want to lie and say 'yeah, I'm great, all fixed and better!' which I suspect they - in their 'let's bounce our way through life pretending everything's fine and glossing over anything difficult' - want to hear. So your 'I'm doing good' is a lovely halfway house.

I'm looking forward to hearing how others handle this and what people have found that works for them. Thanks Lex for opening this up! Xxx

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 7:54am

Hi Debs, glad you find this a useful debate... I often think we have challenges because we are so honest, whereas so many other people are running away from their feelings. Let's see what other folks say. L'xx

Rupert Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 8:26am

I think I understand the blog! Personally feeling very low or black at the moment but taking your theme one step further how do I respond to my own question how am I feeling this morning. For me I find it becomes almost boring admitting day after day that I am in the hole so I don't think I could even begin to try and explain it to someone else. Not sure if this makes sense! Rupert

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 8:36am

Hi Rupert, you make sense to more people than you may realise. We appreciate you sharing how you're feeling. This is the place! You're among those who understand. L'xx

the room above the garage Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 8:49am

Rupert, I love seeing your name on here. Its a great name. Its funny how words on a screen reveal a person and I like who you are. Whilst I completely understand the idea that it could be boring to others (I wrestle with that very same thing) its not boring to us fellow travellers because we use each others lows...as stepping stones...in a good way and hopefully to stick out a hand along the way. It helps me to know just that I am not alone. Just that. So by seeing you log in here, I am better.

Anonymous Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 8:55am

Hi ratg and Rupert and Lex. I find it's impossible to explain to people who have never had depression, insomnia etc how I feel. That's why Moodscope is so great. Whatever we write, our underlying message will make sense. We don't have to go round and round in circles trying to explain. We just click.

the room above the garage Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 9:01am

Precisely x.

Mary Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 11:01am

I was going to comment at the bottom, but it is entirely appropriate here. My response to "How are you?", when in depression, is the phrase "All the better for seeing you!" - which makes them feel good and I don't have to lie about how I am or risk being boring because (yet again) I'm in the dark place. Of course, this is only said to nice people I actually like. If you get the "very well, thank you." then we are obviously strangers; no matter how many times we've met. And today Rupert, I'd like to say that I really am all the better for seeing you! Hello my dear. Please know you are so valued here.

Anonymous Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 8:51am

I love this blog Lex, the way you write it, the issue you raise. My usual refrain in my mind is, "I am a bit tired today, very tired actually, I don't really know why, I didn't sleep well last night..but never mind, how are YOU?" I love your suggestion..I'm doing good thank you. If I can get over the use of the "good" word in this context! I can't say I am doing fine as that wouldn't work. I think I CAN say "I'm doing good thanks!" Lovely. I shall start today but what is it in French? I have to admit my usual reply here is "Pas mal merci, pas mal!" (Jul)

the room above the garage Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 9:03am

Jul...I see you behind your cloak and I think you have hit a new name that you can both sit comfortably behind but that we still recognise :-) xx

Leah Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 10:02am

anon, I usually say to people who I think are interested that I am tired. People can relate to tired. I like your idea of 'pas mal'

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 10:45am

You always do me good... so that's a part of your truth. Try it on for size and see how it feels. Interesting that other languages will have different idioms. I wonder how those idioms mould their culture? Big hug, L'xx

Anonymous Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 2:13pm

You are a sweetie Lex and I hope you managed to get some cream for your coffee. You do make me laugh. I am good at explaining how I feel when I'm feeling high and on top of things but haven't the energy to explain when tired (except to other Moodscopers of course) which is most days. I have so much self confidence on good days that I can talk about anything and everything. I find friends very receptive to listening to my self analysis on these rare good days but can see they can't quite understand what I am saying on my bad days;I try to make light of it and am almost apologetic I suppose so they are puzzled.I would be too! I am definitely going to say "I'm doing good thanks" when I'm back home. You have got me thinking Lex about how to say this in French. I shall ask my philosophical anarchist French neighbour. She will know.She loves a challenge and is so kind.

Anonymous Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 2:13pm

Ooops! Jul xxxx To ratg too

jen Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 8:56am

Hi Lex, Like others, in the future if I feel down and am asked how I am I will use your answer, thanks. I also agree that doing good is a great way to switch your pain to be someone's gain. This happens within moodscope when we support each other, and I think that people who have experienced difficult times themselves,become attracted to helping others and are often the best ones to be of help.
Also, like Rupert, I don't want to talk about the way I am feeling when I am really down, and notice that I track my mood less often. It seems like an unwelcome reminder of how low I am feeling, but I do force myself to complete it and do try to read the posts. My time to talk and share with appropriate friends has become when I am coming back up, to help me with the upward journey. I always lick my wounds and reflect on my own, using all of the tools I now have accumulated from moodscope and elsewhere. How are you really feeling? You help so many, I hope that you are reaping the rewards and feeling good. Which radio station?

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 10:36am

Hello Jen. Thanks for asking how I'm really feeling. Most of the time I feel lost and confused - the world doesn't make sense to me anymore. And those two states of mind have really drawn me to Moodscope and to the community radio station I support in Bournemouth. It's called "Hope FM" and I found its name very attractive! Over the last couple of years, I would have honestly said I was without hope, but since making a small contribution of time to the station and writing regularly for Moodscope, I've regained a sense of purpose. A seasoned broadcaster on the team shared with me how we were the friendly voice to some people in the community - the human contact they would otherwise lack. That's a great thing to be for someone, so I can "emit" positivity for the duration of the show, even if I don't feel so fab myself. I like to think I'm good company for listeners on a Monday and Friday early morning. Since this feels like "doing good" - my response to people's "how are you" also feels genuine. Would love to know how you really are too! L'xx

the room above the garage Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 8:59am

Hello Lex, (your name forever brings me a picture of a building I worked in many, many years ago...Lex toured the building like he was the owner, sat on the front step to welcome, popped in to meetings if he felt the need to oversee major decisions, never overstepped his mark by sitting on a table, just had presence and was enigmatic. You are so much warmer but that's possibly because you can use your paws to type and so I know you more.)

Sat with a large tear reading your blog today. It was timely. I have wrestled with this very thing over the last week. My ex partner, who still must be a big part of my life, is logical and structured. We know that depression is the opposite of that. I had to tell him a little of how I was feeling this week as it impacted upon our holiday. It can be a double whammy to share, even just a tiny bit, and then realise you feel like you have walked into the public domain without your clothes and have silenced the crowd.

I do what you do. I emit and omit. Its just that this week I'm not managing that very well at all. It will return. Thank you my friend. You put into type what my brain needed to read.

Debs Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 9:15am

Oh RATG, you describe exactly my position. I had to explain to my ex what is happening to me at the moment and he is logical and practical exactly like you describe so now I feel vulnerable and exposed. Ever since I told him his texts messages have read 'are you feeling better?' and 'hope life is good!!' as if I've had a cold and should be bouncing back. I try not to be angry with him, and others who say things like 'chin up', but it's hard. I want to cry out 'no, I'm not better you idiot!!!' but instead I say something like 'getting there' or I ignore his question. But then I feel like I'm being fake around him and I know he feels that too. Just a simple 'are you ok' would suffice... maybe I should start telling him that's what I need? Goodness, it's a semantic minefield! I am thinking of you loads my dear and sending much love from my aching self to yours xxx

the room above the garage Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 9:52am

Hugely frustrating and I try to see it from the angle of not understanding and I try to work out how it must feel. I don't understand my illness and so I simply need someone to not understand with me and to say we'll try to pick through it together. On the plus side, my ex partner and yours seem to share what must be credited...they are in touch. That is something. Much love Debs xx.

Leah Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 9:58am

Debs and Ratg always hard dealing with an ex like walking on eggshells. Debs, I think when people have never suffered from depression they have no idea. They can try hard and say what they think is helpful. I think telling people what helps , is helpful. 40 years ago I remember my mum saying people would across the street so they wouldn't have to ask how she was,She said people were afraid of emntal illness and so avoided anyone who was 'sick'.At least that has changed. To you both a big hug from across the seas.

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 10:43am

Hi RATG, I'm purring at your kind words, and weeping inwardly at your discomfort with your ex... but then purring again at the outpouring of love from Debs and Leah. This is what I believe our community is best at - sharing empathetically and even sympathetically with one another without needing to 'fix' one another or 'get better' inappropriately quickly. Hugs and Love, L'xx

Mary Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 11:12am

Oh RATG - please will you blog about that line "It can be a double whammy to share, even just a tiny bit, and then realise you feel like you have walked into the public domain without your clothes and have silenced the crowd." That is incredibly powerful. Yes - it does feel exactly like that - even for me, by now a seasoned stripper! But we need to let people know how they can help. Usually people do want to help, they just don't know how and they think they can help by trying to "fix" us or the problem. Which, of course, just makes us feel annoyed and guilty and inadequate.

the room above the garage Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 2:21pm

Hello Marydoll, you've made me laugh at "a seasoned stripper", brilliant!! I am now whistling 'The Stripper' thank you...it is often a song I end up whistling when I need cheered along and here it is for those who might find it funny...it can only be with Morcambe & Wise (Leah, surely you have them in Oz??) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q1bJHr8t1xA I can't think of a better way to lift moods than that! Mary, I could try to blog on that line, thank you xx. But actually you have given me inspiration that perhaps I might ask my ex to write me/us some words on 'The Other Side'. We've never really been open about it but it gets more so as the years pass. (As a side line, I don't feel right using "my ex", but I have no word to replace it with...nothing fits...)

the room above the garage Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 2:23pm

I see that has come out as one big paragraph...I did space it so it would make for easier reading but the virtual world has decided it likes to challenge us! Sorry all. In my current low, I need things to be visually easy...

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 3:19pm

I wonder if our "ex" partners are really our "Foundation" partners? Charles Handy has some interesting ideas on cycles with partners - how we work well together for a while and then we change - not always in the same direction. I guess many of us will be happy with the foundation we laid with former partners - it wasn't all bad for me, certainly. Oh, how linguistics are important at times! Thanks for the Morecambe and Wise link too, RATG, L'xx

the room above the garage Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 4:54pm

You've described my relationship with him...a cycle. I've never really been away from him. We have continually met over and over in many ways over the years and yet are separate and we are still not. It is a cycle. Will look up Charles Handy thank you x. Morecambe & Wise are my go to. NOTHING beats that sketch for me. I love it so much that my children recreated it for me one Christmas Eve...WHAT A GIFT!!!

LillyPet Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 8:12pm

Thank you for that sketch ratg! Very funny, so clever! Timeless :) xx

Mary Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 9:42pm

Oh - LOVED that Morcambe and Wise sketch! Thank you. Thank you so much!!!!

Mary Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 11:09am

Oh, I can so see our Lex as a big cuddly cat, our own Moodscope purring feline comforter! I love this space. For me it's the only writing forum where I can be totally honest. Lex broadcasts his voice and needs to emit, I blog for my business and need to emit there. Our audiences need our "up" voice. Yes - we can do it for a while, but it's exhausting. Have an energy restoring cuddle, Lex - and when we meet I'll have to cook you my salmon and cream pasta dish - you'll love it (I hope). Miow!

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 12:25pm

Purring, Mary, purring... get the water boiling! L'xx [Actually, someone in our church years ago has a vision of me as puss in boots! Then she had another vision where puss had let himself go a bit. Anyway, got to dash and gets some cream for my coffee!!!!!!]

Terence Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 11:27am

Thank you Lex, it would be good to have a stock answer that suits all occasions while still feeling true. But I will have to practice. I would like to improve on "absolutely fine!" while the tears stream down my face or "Much better than before I went into mental hospital, thank you" x

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 12:23pm

Hi Terence, I hope I'm OK with saying your note brought a smile to my face as I imagined the look on the face of some of my 'understanding' friends if I said, "Much better than before I went into mental hospital, thank you"... I'm sensing humour wrapped around your serious words - and hope I'm right. L'xx

Mary Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 9:43pm

Terence - like Lex, I love your "much better than before I went into mental hospital". Wishing you peace and hugs.

judy Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 12:18pm

I am basically an honest person(perhaps too honest for some) and today's blog has made me realise that times I don't want to see people is because of the falseness of situations. I can't bear having to lie or pretend so it is easier not to. Why do people ask if they don't want to know? Perhaps I need to find a phrase that feels comfortable for me, but I am not doing good so I can't say it. I didn't realise how it bothered me,so it has been a useful blog. Thanks.

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 12:26pm

Hi Judy, I think I understand. My "I'm doing good, thank you" is not exactly honest, is it? I mean that I'm actually choosing to do some good in the day, knowing full well that they're reading it another way. It's a way that 'works' for me, but you have to be true to yourself. I believe you'll find your phrase and it will be perfectly true for you. L'xx

Vivien Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 12:31pm

I find it difficult sometimes to be 'honest' with people. I meet friends and they ask me how I am - why can't I be honest and say 'today I am struggling' - maybe I don't want to bother them. I often chuckle though when in the Doctors Surgery and meet people I know. I or they end up saying 'I'm fine' - well why are you in the Doctors then?? My sister rings up every so often and asks me how I am. If I answer ' I'm fine thanks' she then moans that I always say I'm fine - I'm just being honest. Can't win! Still I feel o.k. at the moment. Take care all.

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 12:48pm

Glad you're feeling OK at the moment, Vivien... and if that changes, it's OK to tell us too! L'xx

The Gardener Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 2:27pm

The French don't really say 'How are you' but 'how are you going'. Subtle? Weather swiftly follows. Then, very amusing. We took farmer friends to UK (first journey out of France). Waiting at Portsmouth for the return ferry they asked 'why are there so many couples, all grey haired and retired (it was June, good visit France time). The French lady said 'Oh, we call them the "tamallos" (that's what it sounded like). In fact it was 't'as mal ou?) 'where does it hurt', because, at that age, something is going to hurt. Today I could not answer 'Good', or 'fine thanks' or 'not so bad'. Surrounded by nurses, doctors, blood tests etc. Desperate for sleep. Desperate for a walk, half an hour with a book. I want to change from my moaning about the idiosyncrasies of Alzheimer's to coping with old age. Both our mothers were centenarians - you would not call their last years happy, but they were lucid, ate well and were well-cared for. The bodily machine wore out, broke down and killed them (last few days, like most in their condition, on increasing doses of morphine). I sat with my mother the last few days and nights, held her hand and talked to her about the past. Now the challenge is greater - a husband whose body is/was OK, but who has no spirit at all, interested in nothing, hasn't got up for last few days. I have to find a 'modus operandi' to try, with all help possible, to keep him alive - otherwise at the moment he will starve to death or be hospitalized and force fed. It does not look as though help will be forthcoming from the family - but, after all, it was us who b******d off to France (and, 'je ne regrette rien). I am sure someone out there has gone this route. In an AIDS hospice in India patients sat round in a circle holding hands, and 'sang' the dying man out of this world with a Hindou hymn. The lepers were into self-help, the more able-bodied helped their handicapped mates. Marius, who had been educated in French, (we were in once French Pondicherry) had lost all his limb ends, his sight and his nose. He had been given a radio, pride and joy. The nun in charge said would I have the courage to talk to him? His passion was to talk French. We spent 20 minutes talking and laughing! I ended up forgetting the sight of this wreck in front of me. I want to laugh - to gossip - even if it's only old sit-coms. So Lex, how am I? Not so good - but going to aim for 'I'm fine'.

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 3:14pm

I think you're amazing... but then I know we're not talking about feeling amazing... rather about you 'being' amazing. What an in-depth 'share' - which will be highly appreciated by all who read. Feels like today's blog has been a little seed that has been nourished by your experience and those of all others who have shared. I'll say it I again, I think you're amazing. L'xx

Mary Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 9:47pm

TG - what an amazing testimony about Marius. But yet your words that mean most to me are "Je ne regrette rien." As always, I am in awe of your courage.

susan Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 2:46pm

"Today,I'm FINE, thank you" (as in Fearful and Fragile; Insecure and Inadequate; Neurotic; Empty and Exhausted). Your blog makes me realize how seldom i speak these words out loud, including big ones like "shamed" and "despairing" followed by a description of the physical sensations that accompany them. I'm not even comfortable saying them here. But i just have, so thank you, Lex (i think)! Won't know how it feels until after pushing the 'add comment' button.... xx

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 3:11pm

Oh Susan, this is a good, bold and brave post. I know enough of psychology to know the positive impact of sharing - especially with the additional impact of writing it out, so I'm confident that this is a move forward for you and I'm glad you've shared. Thank you! L'xx

the room above the garage Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 4:59pm

Ditto Lex. You must have needed to say them, even just in type to begin with, for a reason. Most impressed brave susan (and for Lex's benefit I said that in my best Aslan voice). I'm fascinated by how you have started your name with a small 's'. I do too. And others.

susan Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 6:08pm

Thank you, Lex and ratg. It felt like surrendering...which was obviously needed. I am one who often tries to 'fix' people while knowing that it can be just 'noise'. And it's too tiring, too! And then Lex just happened by this morning with his blog.... As for the small 's', it started with impatience and laziness to actually do the capital letter....and then it began to look better to me-- more modest, more uniform and uncluttered, aesthetically more pleasing and in keeping with a preferred style, i guess. xx

judy Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 4:15pm

Hi Lex i understood your double meaning and I wish I felt I was doing more good in the day but generally I don't, hence the reluctance to say it. I do have to find a suitable response though, as I realise not having one has become an obstacle in my life. I need to work on it.

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 4:28pm

Hi Judy, may I ask you what you love to do? What do you love to learn about? What's your favourite magazine? Please don't think you have to answer all these questions here, I'm merely pointing you towards your personal treasure. The Good Books says, "where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Now, I may be a heretic, but I love to spin that on its head and say, "Where your heart is, there you will find your treasure." And, alongside your treasure, you may just well find your words... L'xx

Dave Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 6:15pm

I feel frustrated today that is how I am...made a plan to chop up all my leaves with my lawn mower today -- which have been bothering me and even found the energy to do it-- then the lawn mower would not work...amazing how such a small thing can knock us down isn't it..was going to get it done, be proud of my work and get some exercise and poof...guess not...keep telling muself come winter and snowfall it will make no difference but still frustrated,,,,so how am I doing? Right now frustrated..actually smiling a lil as I write this..

Lex Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 6:47pm

Hey Dave, your last words made my day. If you can still smile after frustration, there's hope! Thanks for sharing, L'xx

Anonymous Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 6:45pm

So annoying for you Dave. I can feel your frustration with the lawnmower. Was the box which collects the leaves and grass securely fixed to the mower? Mine won't start if the collection box is even slightly adrift. On the other hand I have had to replace mowers each year as they don't like to work for 2 years running.
You can actually buy a leaf blower on Amazon quite cheaply which won't let you down, not like a lawn mower does. It will collect the leaves and churn them up and you can use them for leaf mould or put them on the compost or throw them away. Job done. (Jul)

Anonymous Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 6:48pm

http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_c_0_12?url=search-alias%3Doutdoor&field-keywords=leaf+blowers&sprefix=leaf+blowers%2Caps%2C898

LillyPet Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 8:15pm

Perfect! Am almost "leaved in" to my house! Thanks :)

LillyPet Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 7:26pm

Isnt it always the way Dave? Glad you're smiling about it! Exactly the same happened to me when I finally Summoned up he effort to tackle the 6 inch grass! Strimmer and mower blades had gone. Grrr! If you're like me your effort wont go to waste and you'll be more determined to sort it one way or another! :)

Paul Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 7:32pm

I am similar to others on here I am fine when feeling good, but when I'm down can't be bothered to explain just say I'm fine.
A friend when asked are you all right used to respond I'm all right but half left.
When I ask my auntie who is a very positive person how she is her response is..... I'm above ground which is a bonus. Usually makes me smile.
Paul

LillyPet Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 8:04pm

Love that Paul!

Lex Tue, Oct 20th 2015 @ 5:29am

I'm with LillyPet - nice one Paul L'xx

LillyPet Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 7:45pm

I've steadily deleted people whose intentions I dont trust from my life to the point where I have very few left! So those who are genuinely want to know and I am honest. (Admit)
Others are aquaintances or like Mary so wonderfully put it strangers, so neither of us want my personal business out there! (Omit).
Then there are my kids who I protect from most of it, but we're faily openand who know me well enough to be able to tell how I am (and me them).
Then there's work. Being asked that question can be another whole ball game! "I'm fine thank you and you?" =I'm feeling pretty good

LillyPet Mon, Oct 19th 2015 @ 7:59pm

Whoops sorry pressed reply by mistake before finishing! :)
"I'm ok thanks" = I'm not great but fit for work which is all you really want to know.
Once I said "I'm feeling a bit sick actually" cue ratg's double whammy tumble weed followed by change if subject.
It's remarkable how even in so called caring professions we are penalised and simply not believed even after being made to produce medical evidence. I sometime smile to myself about how satisfying it would be to ask whether I need to produce the relevant sample as evidence if I'm unwell!
I digress, thanks for a great blog Lex! LP :)

Lex Tue, Oct 20th 2015 @ 5:29am

Thanks, LillyPet... I've occasionally ventured a "Groovy" in response. I don't know what it means to me, let alone to them, but it broke the monotony! Yeah! L'xx

LillyPet Tue, Oct 20th 2015 @ 8:05am

Love that Lex! :))

danielle Wed, Oct 28th 2015 @ 11:50am

look at all the wonderful comments Lex. Your blog is a true pleasure to read as always. today i feel turbulent. I feel lost and guilty. But i also know I am lucky in many ways and have a lot of good things in my life - this leading to confusion and busy feelings. but now, after reading the blog and comments I am also feeling loved, supported and joy at the community we have here. thank you

Ruth Sat, Nov 7th 2015 @ 11:56am

This is for Norman who's blog I have just read.Well done for going into hospital for a little R&R and feeling better for the experience.
I've always been afraid of being an inpatient but maybe my fears are unfounded.
Sometimes,as stress and stuff piles up (as now) I wonder if I would be better off on the 'Inside'.......
Being at home and alone except for my woofer is starting to get to me.
I have friends,family and special people but most of them are miles away and I go to them.
I'll make it by myself but be nice not to have to for once......????????????

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What is Moodscope?

Moodscope members seek to support each other by sharing their experiences through this blog. If you’d like to receive these daily posts by email, just sign up to Moodscope now, completely free of charge.

Moodscope is an innovative way for people to treat their own low mood problems using an engaging online tool. Anyone in the world can accurately assess and track daily mood scores over a period of time. We have proved that the very act of measuring, tracking and sharing mood can actually lift it. Join now.

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Disclaimer

Posts and comments on the Moodscope blog are the personal views of Moodscope members, they are for informational purposes only and do not constitute medical advice. Moodscope makes no representations as to the accuracy or completeness of any information on this blog or found by following any of the links.

Moodscope will not be liable for any errors or omissions in this information nor for the availability of this information. The owner will not be liable for any losses, injuries, or damages from the display or use of this information.