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September


Accepting we are who we are. Tuesday September 1, 2015

I'm not a massive Bob Marley fan but was listening to David Rodigan's radio show when driving home tonight and he played "Three Little Birds"...

I have had a couple of days off work this week and have enjoyed the freedom to lie in, to read, to see friends for a coffee. I have also had time, free from my normally ridiculous schedule, to reflect.

I have realised that I have come along way... two years ago I was in psychiatric hospital, completely bewildered as to how I had sunk so low and wondering what the hell was going to happen. That low was followed by nine fraught months as I negotiated the end of a very unhappy marriage, a new job, moving house and trying to ensure our two children were ok.

Now I am decorating my living room, in my lovely little house and have realised that I am happy. Now that's not to pretend that life is all roses... it's taken me over twenty years to accept that I have quite a serious mental health condition and some would call me bi-polar, although I'm not sure that's how I would describe it.

But what I have realised despite all my fears, self-doubt and sometimes self-hatred I am loveable, I have some fantastic friends and I have even rediscovered a sense of humour.

So if your day is not starting well or you are feeling a bit black and blue, whatever you are feeling, like Bob sung "Everything's gonna be alright"... stick with it.

Brum Mum
A Moodscope member.

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment below.


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Comments

Cait Tue, Sep 1st 2015 @ 6:58am

Wow, you are impressive. What you've been through, coped with and able to write about it. You have my admiration for what it's worth :)

Drywsdad Tue, Sep 1st 2015 @ 7:01am

Today is my first day back in work after the bank holiday I'm going to listen to the Bob Marley track on my way, I don't like Tuesday's because my boss is a bully " but today it's gonna be alright" thank you

Hopeful One Tue, Sep 1st 2015 @ 7:36am

Hi Brum Mum- you have had more life changing events in a space of a few months than most of us have in a lifetime! So please congratulate yourself on my behalf for lifting yourself up from where you found yourself to where you are now.

Claire Tue, Sep 1st 2015 @ 7:37am

Thank you for sharing that. I could really relate to all of the things you said there (except maybe the one about not really liking Bob Marley!). I know from my own experience how hard it is ensuring your children are OK through awful times like this - but don't forget to care for yourself through all of this. It helps every little thing to be alright xxx

Sue Tue, Sep 1st 2015 @ 8:10am

Inspirational and I love that song.

Bearofliddlebrain Tue, Sep 1st 2015 @ 8:17am

Amazing! As HO said, you. Have coped with so much in a short space of time...but coped you have. You are a sdar of highest order and a Brum Mum to be proud of.....no wonder you have fantastic friends too. As they grow up, your children will see how amazing you are when they see how you have managed and come through to today...what an inspiration you are to them, and to us all. Glad you have managed to chill over the weekend!

the room above the garage Tue, Sep 1st 2015 @ 8:41am

Thoroughly agree, and self acceptance is so important especially if we don't feel the acceptance of others when we dare to share. There was a beautiful art installation near me last year...a giant neon lit sign saying exactly your message "everything's going to be alright". Watching it glow as the sun sets it is a beacon of strength, calm and reassurance...perhaps it's one to have tatto-ed inside our eyelids :-) Thank you, love ratg x.

Lex Tue, Sep 1st 2015 @ 9:56am

Lovely, heart-warming, and encouraging... what a blog Brum Mum
Thank you
L'xx

susan Tue, Sep 1st 2015 @ 10:16am

I feel many things reading your blog. What a journey you've had and what a lot of joy you convey. So happy for you. You are a huge inspiration, Brum Mum. Thank you for sharing. susanxx

The Gardener Tue, Sep 1st 2015 @ 10:23am

Brum Mum struck a chord this morning. Went out to dinner last night 'a deux'. Lugged husband to restaurant (can't walk, won't walk). Every 5 minutes he asked where the car was - then into profound self-pity. I tried to look nice (celebrating, at a distance, one son's wedding anniversary, a daughter's birthday) restarateur remarked I looked all in, I was. This morning, feeling very low, read blog, turned attention to my future 'museum of costume'. Thought of all my hats (son's wedding, another son-in-law remarked 'Joan Collins' as I appeared, insult or compliment?) Anyway, new idea, collection of whacky hats. Friends have been dispatched to comb car-boot sales and charity shops. Enjoy your 'new' life, Brum Mum

Oli Tue, Sep 1st 2015 @ 8:31pm

Ah, wonderful! This song is special to me for reasons to boring to relay but lovely to be reminded of it again and playing it just now. Thank you for mentioning this song :-)

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