Moodscope's blog



149 days. Tuesday September 15, 2015

That's how long it has been since I last recorded a score. Until today.

Today I felt good and some supportive people in the comments room said good things and I felt it was time I started scoring again. I want to become a master at knowing this illness so well I can start to close off its airways before it eyes up mine.

I have been a Moodscope member for some years, reading daily, never commenting. Eventually I made a small comment anonymously... this was accompanied by shaking. Like someone was just waiting to shine a spotlight over my head and shout "HERE IS THE DEPRESSIVE".

Then I got brave and commented a few times. Braver still and I added a name. (Ridiculously long and un-typeable when you are (a) in a hurry and (b) not well.) I realised it was ok. For long enough I stood in the comments room feeling like I had farted but nobody had heard... I got away with it! Then one day, someone replied to me and there was no going back. I started chucking in my tuppence worth regularly and it made me feel like I had something of worth, that I mattered. That, for me, was key. This illness was something I knew a lot about and I could use that.

Now, I quite often submit a blog. Sometimes it's when I'm broken, the words fall out, and you send me a sentence which is enough to feel sellotaped. Sometimes it's just ramblings and ways that have helped me and so I share in case it might help you. What I wonder is if everyone reading today was to type the word of where they are right now and submit it (anonymously or named) would it make us all feel included?

We might suddenly have a comments room full of people standing side by side, not speaking, but quietly smiling that we're not alone. And feeling included and that you matter is often just the start we need to taking one step towards 'better'.

I dare you to comment with one word of where you are right now. Kitchen.

Love from
The room above the garage.
A Moodscope member.

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment below.

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Kirsten Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 6:14am


Ruth Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 6:26am

So I'm really not alone after, digging in the rain & dark, Morning room above the garage what sense you make xx

Eva Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 6:30am

Bed, just about to get up, shower and then meditate, busy day ahead...

Zareen Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 6:38am

Thanks for sharing.

Andy Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 6:56am

Train to London. Daunting new job but will be ok.

Nikki Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 6:59am


Janet Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 7:27am

Afraid. Just about to head off on 10 day trek and fear of being overwhelmed has me in it's grip. One word, one step at a time...

Anonymous Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 7:28am

Bed with hubby and our 2 Irish setters - yes its a big bed!!

Freya Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 7:43am

Bed. Preparing to dress in my day's armour to face a conference. Man this first ever comment thing is kind of scary. I've spent a good year or so just lurking, reading and testing! Hello brave new world!

Pennie-Lynn Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 7:44am

Tired. Ready for bed, but grateful it isn't yet the start of another day.

Jenny Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 7:47am

Shower. Up and going to make myself get going. First ever comment for me too.

Rebecca Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 7:48am

In dining room, about to go xc schooling with horse.

Carol Anne Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 7:48am

At home. Been my 0630 brisk walk (in the thick eerie fog).
Just about to start my work day (as a home based worker).

I lurk too.... Tend to read and think I've only commented once before. Been using Moodscope for years.
The daily blogs help tons - even if it is just shaping my thoughts in the direction of travel.

Have a good day everyone. ????

Harriet Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:04am

Bed just before I get up to see what another day holds. First post :)

Penny Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:15am

Sofa. For now. Then off to meet a good friend before going to work.

Bearofliddlebrain Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:20am

Anxious...just about to go and weigh-in!
Brill blog, as always, RATG.
Bear x x x

Bearofliddlebrain Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:21am

Welcome all new and old responders...we are all here for each other.

Bravenewworld.comx x x x

Sarah Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:21am

Bedroom, thank you RATG I really enjoy your posts and comments! Yes you do matter and I agree with your thoughts today as Moodscope helps me daily too. I have tried to explain to others who don't know Moodscope, about the community support we have, but they just look at me blankly. I am so pleased you have inspired more members to comment.

Sarah Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:22am

smiling. thank you for bringing lots of people together....about to do school run...

Sarah Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:22am

hey look at that ...2 Sarah's!!

JD Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:32am

Hostel room. Still trying to understand how my life led me here. 500 plus days without doing the test. Never posted before. Now I have...

Carol Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:34am

Bed - overslept & missed a walk with my friend, very menopausal today but will get up & go. Love your blogs - thank you ????

Amora Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:38am

Lurking in the doorway of the blog room - feint smile on my lips. Feel comforted and thankful. I whisper my first comments but after this first step my voice might become a little stronger. You are an inspiration!

Carol Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:38am

Whoops - those question marks were supposed to be a smiley face - there is no question - I really do find your posts helpful thanks!

Shelley Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:40am

I am in bed trying to wind down from the night shift. Thank you for sharing.

Georgina Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:46am

Manchester airport

Lex Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:47am

RATG, how brilliant are you? Look at these responses, and you made it easy for us all. Very touched by JD's response. JD - great step forward.
As for me, and my desk, writing.

Niamh Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:56am

Living room, sun streaming in.

Terence Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:59am

Sitting at breakfast table, showered and shaved, humming a song called 'Better Days'. I too very much love your blogs

Bearofliddlebrain Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 9:15am

JD - you have taken a great step in responding to ratg's brilliant blog...anything we Moodscopers can do to help?

Adrian Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 9:19am


Chelsea Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 9:19am


Petal Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 9:21am

Living room. My daughter's going through heartbreak and I'm feeling her pain, but thanks for the encouaging blog Pam. Just the nudge I needed to join in!

Jenny Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 9:40am

Apprehensive. Awaiting news of partners upcoming surgery. 12 weeks of ill health and uncertainty.

Victoria Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 9:41am

Study. Doing a little work before a training course this afternoon. Tired, but enjoying the sense of community here.

Good luck with the new job Andy. You can do it! One day at a time.

the room above the garage Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 9:44am

Well, I'm sitting with tears in my eyes to see that so many of you brave and tolerant people who are battling all kinds of things are willing to stand together and just be. What a fabulous bunch you are xxxxx.

Kirsten - you opened the door at 6.14am, wear that hopeful badge with great pride

Ruth - you are never alone and I hope you have a flask of something hot to bring comfort from the harshness of that early start

Eva - brilliant, meditation to arm yourself

Zareen - my pleasure!

Andy - being the new boy all over again is hard at any age, I find the toilets are a great place of respite on those early days, just to refocus and breathe, feel warm water on your hands and remember time eases mostly everything

Nikki - my son has anxiety, try counting your breaths in and, out(2), in(3), out(4), in(5), out(6), in(7), out(8), in(9), out(10) then start again. The concentration from your brain working out which breath and number you are on next is sometimes just enough to stop the chemicals flooding from your brain into your blood. I hope you feel better.

Janet - wow! On day 11 this will be just a memory and you will feel immense pride in yourself, I feel proud of you already!

Anon 7.28 in the big bed - thank you for letting us in along with you all!

Freya - yahoo, good to see you have smashed the door down, hello brave new you

Pennie-Lynn - I hope you can rest a while and find small things to bring comfort, I'm glad you came

Jenny - welcome and don't be a stranger now you know its ok in here

Rebecca - wow, what a start to the day!

Carol Anne - thick, eerie fog at 6.30am, feel proud!

Harriet - you've done it, now you are here, great to see you

Penny - what a good start to the day, friends help shape us

Bearofhugebrain - K, you weigh by your contribution in here, the heavier the better!! And muscle is heavier than flab

Sarah 8.21 - thank you very much, we have such a crowd that we'll need extra biscuits soon :-)

Sarah 8.22 - I used to hate having to face people on the school run but now I see its what helps keep me healthy. Its the structure that Lex was talking of yesterday that gets me up and facing the world

Both Sarahs - you one of you wear a flower? :-D

JD - as Lex said, your post is precious to me. We don't care how long its been, just count today as your new beginning. I'm really pleased you came in, maybe we can be your shelter from the storm xxx.

Carol - things happen for a reason, you must have been meant to oversleep, it protected you from something or showed you that you needed the sleep. You made me laugh just by typing the word 'Whoops', its just one of those words!

Amora - not me, but you, your bravery to type your comment will have inspired another

Shelley - sink into the pillow, its done, its over, this time is yours

Georgina - I'm not a big fan of flying but airports remind me of meeting my granny off a plane when she came back from a long trip away, I missed her so much. My headteacher let my parents pick me up early from school...he was always extremely stern, he came into the class to say I had a dentist apppointment and needed to leave straight away. What a great surprise they all treated me to and never forgotten. Thank you for commenting and bringing me that wonderful memory this morning x.

Lex - good morning my fellow traveller, chinking coffee cups with you, I feel so proud of this bunch! May your day go well.

Welcome everyone, I'm so glad you all came. Now you know the way, keep popping in. It helps everyone!

Love ratg x

the room above the garage Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 9:54am

Niamh - I can picture that, thank you

Terence - if that is Springsteen's 'Better Days' we can be friends forever

Adrian - then my work here done! :-)

Chelsea - and now we're there too, thank you

Petal - how sad, my mum has felt mine too, how great you are there for her and how hard for both of you. Tell her I send love. And to you. Stay with us.

Jenny - that sounds very tense. I hope other things can be put on hold whilst you pull together and battle through this time. Thank you for commenting and keep us posted.

Victoria - brilliant, tired but still helping another, hope your course goes well

Love ratg x

NewChallenge Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 9:54am

Sofa - gearing up to start the "to do" list

Fran Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 10:02am

Office. This is only my 2nd ever comment and It is good to see that so many of us feel exactly the same from time to time, We all have the good days and the bad days but we are all in it together!
You are so inspiring, thank you for your Blog's.

Mary Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 10:03am

Study. Trying some summon up energy to do stuff. With 11% today and weak jittery legs it's a challenge. So proud to be part of this community and WOW - what an amazing post from you RATG!

Louise Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 10:06am

Desk at home - armed with tea, anxiety and a long to do list.
Thanks for getting us started RATG - big well done hug :)

Rosemary Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 10:17am


The Gardener Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 10:25am

In my study - surrounded by about 3,000 books. Husband, Alzheimer, miserable this a.m (and last night, and, oh the sadness of it, always). But it's respite day! Work starts on new house.Sun shining, masses of flowers, church bells, kissed or shaken hands with several people - so the contacts via Moodscope blog are reinforced with the people I see. Joy to you all.Louise, attack that list - must do, won't do, delegate, bin - sounds a good mantra!

the room above the garage Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 10:31am

NewChallenge - I often add some I've done just for the pleasure of scoring it off. You can add and score off 'comment on Moodscope'. Tis DONE!

Fran - sometimes just saying it is so hard and yet when we do, it is released almost immediately. I'm sure if more people regularly comment they will start their own tree of growth and branch out wider and wider. Giving and receiving. Thank you for commenting...twice? You are now a regular!

Mary - maybe today is the day to let go. Summoning up energy when there is none to summon is asking for trouble. Perhaps you need to go with what your body is telling you.

Louise - have you tried the A, B, C list approach? A is the list that needs done today if today was the last day in the world, B is for things that you would really like to be done this week, and C is for everything else. Its a lesson in itself. And thank you for the hug!

Rosemary - hello and welcome, I'm glad you came

Love ratg x.

Kiera Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 10:38am

Sitting on the floor in my living room, trying to work out today's step by step plan for thesis writing so I don't get overwhelmed

alice Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 10:43am

train to work - hoping today is better than yesterday

Bearofliddlebrain Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 10:48am

Sorry, just had to come back in and say...WOWEE ZOWEE, RATG! How immense is this? What an inspiring peeps you are and now that inspiration has been passed from pillar to pillow to bedroom post, in the kitchen, at a desk, in gardens and I've just told my weighing-in lady what an amazing bunch of peeps there are on Moodscope. She in turn, is going to tell more sad peeps about this amazing site...there are a lot of us battling with weight issues as well as challenges of the mind!

You should be justifiably proud - score of 3 on the test cards RATG. I'm proud of you and all those who have had the courage to say something today. Bear x x x x

Louise Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 11:03am

Thanks for the thoughts folks. Sadly the list is causing the anxiety and the majority of both has been imposed. I suspect many of us have the same issue; do what we tell you, not what will make you well!

Helen Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 11:23am

In bed, looking at grey sky. I just took the test for the first time in 111 days, and yes, the score is below average. However, I am warm (thank you, universe, for central heating), and I am going to get up now, make some coffee, and drink it in my armchair in my art room. One small step at a time, everyone.

Caroline Ashcroft Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 11:24am

WOW, WOW, WOW! What a wonderful response. Welcome to everyone who has commented today for the first time and a big thank you to RATG for writing such a great piece. Myself, I'm sitting in my car on a friend's drive using their internet - so excited that so many people have commented today, but very cross with BT as my internet has been down 24 hours so far and they might, MIGHT, be able to fix it tomorrow!!! Carolinex

Andy Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 11:29am

Tired. Getting up and driving to work is a real challenge at the moment. Great blog and some great comments. It really does help to know that other people are going through the exact same horrible feelings as yourself. It helps to reinforce that we're not alone.

Frankie Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 11:39am

Living room - cheering all newcomers - welcome and please stay!

Procrastinating ...
yes, lists that cause anxiety - I recognise that one Louise ...

My current mantra "Action leads to motivation" helps me; I start with something, anything (just made a coffee and opened planner) and tell myself "I'll just do one thing" - which turns into a series of "one things" ... Good luck Louise

RATG - SO great to see you back and WOW! Look at what you have started! Thank-you.

Wishing everyone peace of mind and heart as ever ...

Nicola Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 11:48am

Office! Excellent blog, RATG. I think the feeling of community is one of the greatest benefits of this site. It helps to make you feel less isolated, especially helpful when you are coping with a situation which tends to make you feel spectacularly horribly isolated xx

Jane Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 12:01pm

Hospital - total new commentor here, maybe it's being somewhere alien whilst reading the blog email (and usually not commenting), as well as the build up of appreciation for the site, the daily tests, emails and very much the quotes at the end of the emails. All in all,I'm joining the invisible non-pity but virtual bonding party. I'd like to come here often !

Margie Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 12:27pm

Bed. Smiling!! Almost never comment, but always love the blogs from above the garage!!

linda Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 12:29pm

132 days since i last recorded a score, so thankyou for the gentle nudge.
On the couch in my pj's with my cat.

Kaye Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 12:46pm

In the British Library. Moderately anxious about an important work meeting I have travelled to London in the pouring rain for. But I'm better for the gentle nudge - first post; over a month since I last recorded my score.

G Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 12:46pm

dear Room above the garage .I am at work so have to be brief.I have noticed your name from the beginning of it appearing or me noticing and was instantly pleased how all encompassing and omnipresent it was.I like this post a lot.This is what this blog should be about - supportive presence of like wise spirited not navel gazing showing of and telling ... post should cause a warm feeling in the stomach ,a smile not angry outburst at being patronized . I ADMIRE YOUR SENSITIVITY ( slip of the finger - not shouting ) as some posts put me of opening moodscope mails for a long time too hence doing the graph.keep on keeping on ...g.

The Gardener Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 1:38pm

Immediate response to RATG, in the study, stupid, where else? Then realise I am antediluvian - have sophisticated phone I have not mastered, and lap-top which weighs 3 kgs. all those people with I-pads and smart phones, they might be, and are, anywhere. And as for Linda, on the sofa at mid-day in her p j's, how delinquent. Jealous? Moi? Anyway, I don't have p j's. Not all that upright, however. Went to bed Saturday evening with half a bottle of champagne and the Last Night of the Proms. Seriously good.

Rose Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 1:52pm

Office. Feeling stressed because I had a meeting about the impending redundancy and because I had a bad nightmare last night.

Tips for shaking off nightmares so they don't linger through the day welcome.

Frankie Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 2:07pm

Hi Rose - good luck with it all - ghastly for you.
re; nightmares - for me, firmly reminding myself (out loud if possible) "It was just a dream; it is not reality" followed by
"All is well, I am safe". I found Louise Hay hugely helpful ...
Wishing you peace of mind and heart

Lucas Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 2:12pm

In the bathroom. Which at home is always a nice, quiet place, safe from anything it seems, no matter where I've been calling home. I feel thats not really what the question was asking, but that's the only answer I have, because when it comes to where I am with my mood or with my life or whatever, I don't know.

But it was a pleasant surprise to see how many other people answered literally.

Nikita Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 2:17pm

office, want to be elsewhere

Silvia Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 2:18pm

took 13 days to sort out telephone line and impacted internet, was totally incommunicado for that time. Feeing hopeful that I will manage to sort out problems in the future. Glad to be able to comment.

Sally Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 2:22pm

Living room .Cup of tea after a 4 mile walk in pleasant countryside. Glad I went and didn't find reasons not to!!

susan Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 2:27pm

I am in bed recovering from a nasty concussion, trying not to sewer into depression. Repeating 'this too shall pass'. But oh my goodness, ratg, this is just beautiful! As are you. love xx

the room above the garage Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 2:37pm

The Gardener - new house? Fresh start! Flowers and sunshine sounds like a good mix. Alzheimer must be crushing and so I hope you have moments for you in there. Champagne in bed with TV watching the Proms...brilliant!

Keira - oh my, thesis writing. That will indeed need a plan to avoid being overwhelmed. However, you have come this far and therefore you are already a superhero...just roll it out.

Alice - train to work, I hope you have a seat and can daydream on the way?

Bear - you make me laugh :-D

Louise - can you explain? What have you been told that doesn't sit with being well? In my basic opinion, your own oxygen mask must be fitted before you can fit anyone else's and becoming well is a very individual thing...

Helen - how was the coffee? An art room...sounds beautiful! Well done for doing your score, now you have a starting point x.

Caroline - I know that pain. Had to love the response '...confirming there is indeed a fault, if its our fault we will fix it (in our own time) but if its not our fault please hand over your money now and then we'll fix it...' or similar. Grrrr.

Andy - thank you for commenting. Its exactly that, we are not alone. Is it a long drive to work? If so, I recommend a really good hot mug for a (safe) sip on the way and some Chris Evans on Radio2. He celebrates the small stuff in life. I wish an early bed for you.

Frankie - hello, how lovely to see you. 'Action leads to motivation'...I'm going to borrow that!

Nicola - yes, lets smash isolation, pleased you commented and I'm pleased to stand beside you.

Jane - and its good to have you here! I hope your visit to hospital is short but productive. Welcome to here :-)

Margie - love your name and thank you for making me smile

linda - perhaps a little procrastinating is needed, when you grow bored you'll make your change x.

Kaye - I feel honoured. You've trusted us with this on your important day. I hope your meeting goes well. Keep us posted.

G - thank you! You have elevated me to such a height I hope I don't get a nosebleed.

The Gardener - you do make me laugh! :-)

Rose - great that you have commented. I hope someone has a good tip on nightmares lingering through the day. I only have the very occasional one. Maybe writing out the key points from it on paper and then seeing if you can link some reasons why it came up? That way you can perhaps prove to yourself that it is linked to real stuff in your life and not a real thing that can haunt you. I suppose it is your minds way of processing everything and so if you have a full mind your sleep will pay. Do you ever meditate? I'm new to it but it is helping my mind to 'file' so that my jumble is feeling like it has a place. Also, reminding yourself whenever it reappears that "its over now, its not real, lets go forward" might help you build mental strength.

Love ratg x.

the room above the garage Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 2:45pm

Lucas - in the bathroom is perfect! It was the literal answer I was after, just to see if we could come together. I have found this really lovely and fascinating at where and when we have all replied. I have peaceful times in bathrooms too and find toilets a bit of a safe haven whether they be at work, shops, parties or anywhere. Pleased to meet you my friend.

Nikita - yes. Paint us the picture of where else... I'd be on a remote Scottish beach.

Silvia - ah, lovely you have made it in! Do you feel like you have battled?

Sally - brilliant. I have set something up for tomorrow which means I will have to get out and walk, no avoidance. Enjoy your cuppa.

Susan - how funny...I have been thinking of you and wondering where you were. So sorry to hear about your concussion! This time will indeed pass and you may dip but you know you can lift again. We will be here to lend our hands. For now, just be. Don't try for anything else.

Love ratg x.

Frankie Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 3:17pm

P.S. Action leads to motivation ... is a quote from Hopeful One - not an original of mine! Thanks RATG.

Paul Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 3:23pm

WOW 68! Comments amazing you have broke a record I'm sure
Your post really made me laugh. Great responses.
I'm working finishing a bathroom,
Feeling pretty good today , got my pushbike out on Sunday went in a 15 mile ride on a cycle path.
Was hard at the start but passing people most of which said good morning lifted my mood a lot, and the wind on your face going downhill is amazing makes one feel young again.

Any one with a bike try and get out there , the after effects are great
Regards to all

Phillippa Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 3:30pm

I'm at work wading through what seems endless admin work. At least I can see that I am making progress even if it is work that I shouldn't really have to do.

Louise Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 3:45pm

RATG - if I said DWP would I need to explain further?! if so, perhaps a private message might be better...

Louise Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 3:47pm

I have had this thread open on my computer all day and keep checking back - RATG you have really started something lovely here and thanks and hugs to everyone who has been brave enough to comment - especially those who have never commented before.

John Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 4:42pm

Sitting at my standing desk made of stacked Christmas ornament boxes. The new high chair is yellow and allows me to stand, sit, or perch. Gotta keep moving.

I recall my first moments as a kid (maybe 11 years old) who wanted to comment on a radio call-in show. The jitters, the six-second delay. Wasn't ready for that. I said my comment and ... life went on. Oh, maybe it's not that big a deal.

Now I'm getting ready comment before the city council on the value of tenant protections this week.

Collectively we're halfway to a goal of one comment for each day skipped by RATG. Okay, lurkers, here's the invitation you've been waiting for.

Joy Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 4:44pm

computer desk - thanks RATG for this inspiring post and all your other posts that I've enjoyed but never left a comment. Keep sharing!

Dave Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 5:03pm

Slipping a lil anyways

Tronador Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 5:11pm

at desk and "lighter". Made a daily sced yesterday. It always helps me feel more centered. Did not faithfully follow it today. At some pint in my life that'd flatten me. Not anymore. On journey of enough IS enough.

Jen Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 5:15pm

Favourite arm chair

Jen Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 5:15pm

Favourite arm chair

Jen Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 5:17pm

I have two apparently?!

Les Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 6:24pm


How Great...........I hope you achieve what I would think is the first post with over 100 comments.....this I think is 81.

I use a phrase - 'Show weakness to gain strength'....

When someone, especially a leader - or in this case a blogger - RATG - shows their own weaknesses, then others feel safer to show theirs. Unlike many 'managers' who think it is all about how much you know and never to show weakness..........

What a fab response and how great is it that so many have responded.....!!

Your 'dare' has worked perfectly..

I wonder if we could ever reach 149 comments for your 149 days...and 'dare' you never to leave it longer than the future?

Right now my one word - a word for you - is inspired.

"If something comes to life in others because of you, then you have made an approach to immortality." Norman Cousins

Cathi Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 7:14pm

Took the test a minute ago... 112 days gap... thanks for the reminder... read it in the morning in bed for the first time and now again... wonderful as always.. first comment ever... feel both excited and anxious... thanks so much! :-)

Nicole Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 7:35pm

Upstairs in the 'loft' area where I look out of my window at the trees instead of getting on with my writing.
(Why does this feel so scary?)

Anonymous Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 7:47pm

Physically sick so in bed..

the room above the garage Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 8:42pm

Paul - I'm glad I made you laugh :-) They say you never forget riding a bike...I have a real fancy for it but I crashed into the back of a parked car the last time I was on a bike and the embarrassment still lingers! I fear a repeat.

Phillipa - possibly mind numbing but it will feel good to be clear of it. Thanks for joining in. Wish we could help!

Louise - I think you are referring to your work? Is it mind numbing? I agree, its impressive how many people came in today.

John - you have history in being brave then! Love the sound of your desk. Welcome!

Joy - its been a real pleasure today, what reward that so many commented. Good to see you.

Dave - did your score slip? Share some more and see if we can help...

Tronador - Welcome in. "Enough is enough" - I've said that many times to myself. Which specific thing is enough?

Jen Jen Jen - Love it!!! :-)

Les - you were my original inspiration to write blogs my friend. Sometimes your words would leap off the page to me and it was a relief to know someone understood. You write up and you write down...that was the little package I needed to show me the world still turns. I hope all is well with you where you are, North of me. Thank you for the things you have said.

Cathi - and now it is done! How do you feel? I love that we've been with you on this leap. Pat yourself on the back and know that you are now here and all is well. Be a frequent visitor my friend.

Nicole - you are clearly absorbing energy from the view so that you can write! Scary...and now, still scary? You did it. One day we might see you write here...

Anon 7.47 - sorry to read that. May some good, solid sleep bring your recovery.

Love ratg x.

Oli Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 9:26pm

Living room. Guinea pigs are munching noisily. I've been reflecting on the day and flicking through the couple of books which arrived from amazon. Just about to record my score. (Only missed two days in however many years it's been because I find it useful.)

Caroline Ashcroft from Moodscope Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 9:37pm

I think Les's challenge of 149 comments to match the days that RATG didn't record her score is great. Is there anyone else out there that reads the Moodscope blogs that hasn't thought about commenting or felt comfortable about commenting? Come and join this very wonderful community. Just one word. Where are you now?

Chris Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 10:08pm

Sofa - wondering how many days it is for me too!

Anonymous Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 10:25pm

Kitchen too - at the end of the day, never posted before - 44 days since my last score, but I read the blog everyday - Thanks for being there RATG and everyone, hope I can return some strength back with these few words

Chris Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 10:30pm

61 days not as long as I thought. Once it has been a while knowing that the feedback will include words of chastisement becomes another reason for not doing your score- or is that just me?? Perhaps when there's been a long gap it could say "we missed you", "great to see you back" or "it's good to see you checking on your score"...

Andrew Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 11:14pm

Bed, sad but blessed. My mother's funeral today. She survived 15 long years with vascular dementia. Saw some family members for the first time in ages. My partner and the dog were stars. Feel Mum's presence with me now.

Karen Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 11:28pm

In the lounge. Tired after a long day travelling home from France to UK. Work tomorrow and wishing it wasn't. Feeling guilty as not done mood scope for ages, but encouraged by your blog. Thanks.

Rona Tue, Sep 15th 2015 @ 11:46pm

Lying on my bed in the half of my friend's barn that I moved into over a year ago when I became indigent. In Ohio and grateful my friend was kind enough to create a wonderful little living space for me so I wouldn't be I'm writing from the small space I happily occupy with my 2 cats..there's my first post ever. Thanks for the inspiration! Hugs to all.

Caroline Ashcroft from Moodscope Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 12:13am

Andrew, Sorry to hear about your mother - a dreadful disease. So pleased that you are feeling your mum's presence with you. Thanks for sharing it on Moodscope.

Di Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 1:21am

Dearest Room Above the Garage ~
Writing to you from my very old family dining table while mulling over my sacred lake house refuge & my exquisitely textured life . . . Lovingly, Di

Anonymous Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 3:11am

Living room. Feeling so grateful for all the stories shared. All the bravery to write frankly about the challenges we share, even as the details vary.

Ruth Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 6:37am

Only 24 hours since my first venture in & here I am back in the garden digging, what's changed? Its still dark, but so much it feels & not simply because today its not raining, today my heart isn't weeping & the need for the exhausting physical doing to keep me emotionally safe is less demanding, I might allow myself some rest & look up, breath in the day evolving around me rather than escaping with my head down. Today for the first time in my whole life i feel a sense of belonging, something that's more powerful than any medication, self help book or counselling i have ever experienced, i kept checking in on the blog throughout the last 24 hours & with each new comment left i could visualize everyone connecting together, heart felt thanks to RATG & all who commented, i prescribe self worth for belonging x

Leah Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 7:00am

I was going to wait so I could be comment no 100 but I felt I had to respond to your touching comment. I do hope you keep on feeling a sense of belonging by reading blogs, by commenting, perhaps even writing a blog. See this as a beginning to feeling part of a community not just a one off.
I for one look forward to reading more of your comments. I wouldn't give my no 100 position for anyone!! That sense of belonging is so important and sometimes we can try so hard but we just don't get that feeling.
Thanks again for daring to comment and please keep on daring. We welcome you with open words. Leah
Ratg- what a wonderful response you elicited. You keep on surprising me and I am not easily surprised! Keep on letting your words of wisdom and fun flow.
To everyone who commented for the first time, please keep on commenting as we love reading your words. Well done everyone!
from Leah who wanted to be 100 but is happy with 98!

mary Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 7:01am

Lounge room.

Leah Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 7:02am


Sarah Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 8:06am

Ruth, I agree with your comment about belonging being powerful. I felt more positive yesterday and it was definitely due to the Moodscope blog and comments. My energy was better too.
RATG. I liked your idea about choosing a flower, I think it will be yellow rose!

Petal Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 8:08am

In bedroom smiling.
I'm happy for you Ruth, that you have found another safe place here.
Ratg- Thanks for your thoughts. My daughters doing better than I thought. Distractions, an emergency tub of icecream, hugs. Another life experience.
It's great that so many have commented and recorded scores! I hope less people feel guilt about not having recorded scores for a while. There are always reasons. Nothing to feel bad or chastised about, just there for you to help. I did mine before checking these comments today! Just doing it somehow helps. Sometimes I skip days, sometimes I'm on a roll. Sometimes I'm low and dont want to, sometimes I'm low and do it then have a rant in the explanation! Sometimes a one word explanation! :) Sometimes I feel great and it's nice to write why. Often I dont write at all. It's like a number diary just for me, no one's judging and definatetley no guilt! :)

Julia Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 8:40am

I am in my computer room, aware of the rain and grey outside and about to do day 6 of Headspace:-)

the room above the garage Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 10:22am

Oli - I'm impressed by that and welcome to the guinea pigs for joining in :-)

Chris - and now you are back on, another little thing to make a difference, well done

Anon 10.25 - glad you came! I hope you'll visit often, its like a park bench...even on the quietest of days someone will pass.

Andrew - your post was very meaningful. This has been like a little snapshot of our worlds to see where and when everyone has been. Heartbreaking to say goodbye to your mother. Thank you for coming in to stand beside us and allow us to be a part of your day. I wish you strength for your days and peace for your nights. She is with you as my granny is with me xx.

Karen - it was a long day for you and I hope work is gentle. No guilt please, we pause for a reason and pick up when we can.

Rona - that is wonderful, and your post made me smile. Welcome in to commenting.

Di - hello and its lovely to see you again!

Anon 3.11 - exactly this, together stronger.

Ruth - I'm so pleased you have felt this!! It was precisely that feeling that opened me up to healing in a different way. It felt like a branch of a tree that had grown and continues to grow in all kinds of ways. You do belong. Do allow yourself to look up and find the door to the daily blogspot wide open so we can be beside you.

Leah in your shop - you are lovely and you make me laugh, everything you said is spot on and sounded better as 98, there was something understated and dignified about that :-D And I agree, Ruth might build up to writing - that last post would be perfect as a blog...

Sarah - you came back!! With flowers too. We are lucky.

Petal - yes, no guilt, just returning and returning when the time is right. I'm glad your daughter is a little improved. Maybe see you on the next blog...

Julia - brilliant stuff, day 6. No miracles yet but a gentle growth. Love it.

the room above the garage Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 10:29am

Dear everyone, thank you so much for taking up the dare. I'm stunned by how many came and shared and stood side by side. It was like watching a film of A Day in the Life...utterly fascinating. Some shared very personal things and that is an honour to be allowed the trust that requires. We are not alone in this challenge we have. We belong. And I hope you each feel less afraid to walk in to the blogspot and know you can say what you feel and will be heard, replied to or even just witnessed. It does make a difference.

See you on the next one my friends. Love ratg xx.

danielle Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 11:59am

i am a bit late to the party but at my desk in the office thinking wow we are all a force to be reckoned with when we come together - well done ratg. another excellent blog as always :)

Les Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 12:59pm

'The spirit is strong within you RATG'

Amanda Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 4:28pm

at work ... slightly jaded but overall coping at present. RATG, brilliant idea - I don't comment often but this is a great way of being able to find out who is in there with me. Hello lovely Moodscapers!

Dawn Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 5:15pm

119 days and lower than usual score, but I'm nearer 100% than 0% which is always good.
I can't think of an adequate word, but WOOOOWWWWW! to all the comments, I've never seen so many! Well done all the new people, keep on posting :D love, Dawn xx

Lesley Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 5:23pm

Kitchen - rebuilding and shaping my mailbox - trying to clean up the email mess I left during the worst of the depression. F*** what a slog. Reflects the house and the finances.
Hi Room Above - you know I love your posts. When I wrote my first blog about 18 months ago - you commented, and it helped. I am struggling with physical and emotional pain and not looking forward to the darkness ahead. However, I am playing the villain in a UK amateur production of a pantomime and by gum do I get to be nasty and unreasonable - all the things we can't do in real life. And it feels great!
Love and laughter, and screams and shucks when we don't feel like that. Lesley xx

Susan Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 5:47pm

What a brilliant response to your lovely blog..sorry my response is a day late...Panicking as due in to work tomorrow to discuss whether to go back to my old job and risk getting ill with stress again, trying something completely new (at nearly 60 that's not easy!) or retire without a pension..I'm depressing myself with the options..what happened to the book I meant to write,the plans I had, the business I was going to set up?

Frankie Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 8:55pm

Hi Susan,
Thinking of you ...
I had a tough year at work last year; thankfully I have been allowed to reduce my hours and already I feel better.
Can you reduce hours? responsibilities?
Good luck for tomorrow.

Petal Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 9:56pm

Hi Susan, thinking of you too. A change might be daunting, but refreshing too. Difficult as we get older, yes, but people are often very nice to new comers! Anyhow just a thought, go with your gut feeling and all the very best. X

Leah Wed, Sep 16th 2015 @ 10:58pm

I am thinking of you too. I hope the meeting goes the way you would like it. I am a similar age and know change can be challenging but also can be rewarding. Let us know what happens. There is a whole community here that cares about you. Many writers also write their best books over 60.Take care Leah

Susan Thu, Sep 17th 2015 @ 8:34pm

Thanks Frankie,Petal and Leah for your encouragement! The meeting went ok but I've realised unless they make exceptions for my memory problems I won't be able to go back to the old role..pressure is off for now..Leah I may just write that book!!!

Frankie Thu, Sep 17th 2015 @ 9:58pm

Susan, thanks for letting us know!
Glad the pressure is off for now.

Thanks to Louise Hay, I use the affirmations "I lovingly release the past, I joyfully embrace the future" which have been hugely helpful to me ...
Sometimes the old clichés can be valuable "When one door closes, another one opens" - wonder what's on the other side ...
Frankie x

Debs Fri, Sep 18th 2015 @ 12:55pm

WoW!!!! Room above the Garage!!! I've only just seen this blog - how on earth did I miss it??!!! Amazing stuff - soooooo proud of you!!!!! Amazing amazing amazing!

Debs Fri, Sep 18th 2015 @ 12:55pm

Oh and dining room ;-)) Just about to stop procrastinating and do some work xx

Alice Thu, Sep 24th 2015 @ 2:51pm

Only just seen this promets by Les's blog. How did I miss it! What a fabulous response to a lovely blogger. God bless you RATG and look after you. You rock xxxxx

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