Moodscope's blog

29

October


The Road Less Travelled - again. Thursday October 29, 2015

People are so deep,
And we rarely see,
What's in you,
And what's in me?

So much
Pain.
So much
Hurt.

So much surface,
We let others see.
Yet what's in you,
And what's in me?

Do we even know,
Why we do what we do?
Why we get into,
So many stews.

Subconscious life,
Will lead to strife.
The road less travelled,
Like a clinician's knife.

The inner cut,
Has to be done.
The inner soul,
Has to be won.

You can only love others,
As much as you love you.
The road less travelled,
Is for so few.

Les
A Moodscope member.

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment below.


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Comments

Liane Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 5:18am

Do we need to struggle alone? Maybe. If we try to find inner peace alone yet continue a pattern to correct childhood damages without success then it's time to try a new road to peace. Many have struggled. Some will struggle forever. The people who open their inner struggle to others, who are willing to acknowledge others can and want to help can find a road to peace. This road is not driven by only one person, others have struggles too. To achieve self love, to find inner peace, get a map, One will drive forever on the road of life without a map, circling around, trying deparately to find peace. Stop and get that map, ask for help, others know the way that you've been searching for. The journey may still have bumps along the way, but at least you're driving in a direction towards your goal. Everyone needs a map.

Nick Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 7:16am

Beautiful, Les, thank you. xx

readerwriter Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 8:10am

Les - so right, so good. It's all about allowing the love

LillyPet Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 8:26am

Yes, we know ourselves best, looking inward to learn about who we are, what helps us and what doesn't. I also agree with you and Lianne, it can be like surgery to dig deep certain skills are needed and I like the idea of getting a map rather than struggling for years, trying to reinvent the map and feeling lost.

I don't like to be negative, but the maps cost a fortune! The NHS are struggling to provide care for even the most acutely ill when it comes to mental healthiness. Yet there are free maps for all manner of physical symtoms and ailments. Thankfully we have on Moodscope a wealth of experience to share!
A great blog Les, thank you! LP

Liane Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 11:43am

"Maps cost a fortune." YES. Try problem solving alone and if you find yourself in a repeat mode, driving in a circle, experience a pattern repeated throughout life, then look for another means to improve your life. Our health, both physical and mental, can allow us to live a life we desire or can prevent us from a full life. Do everything possible to get that obstruction out of our roadway. Be aware that all maps are not great. Look for a map that matches your needs. Maybe put off that ski holiday. We all have choices. Mental health is very important to one's view of life. We're not in life alone. Seek help.

LillyPet Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 6:00pm

Hi Liane, I totally agree that mental health is vitally important. As much as physical health, one and the same. It's just a great pity that in seeking help for the physical, we generally dont have to consider what to sacrifice to make the choice. It's the way things are in the UK right now. Unbalanced. I also agee that never-the-less we need to seek help rather than struggle alone. There is free mental health help out there, just not to the same degree. Thanks so much for raising such an important point. LP

Leah Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 8:42am

You can only love others,
As much as you love you.

Les, I have discussed how this isn't true for me , before.I have an infinite capacity for loving others but less for me.
Nothing you have said has convinced me otherwise. I think it is a good quality to love others more than your self.
Isn't the Road less travelled the title of a book??
Your blogs make me think even if I don't always agree. Thanks

susan Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 10:02am

Hi Leah, M. Scott Peck wrote the book in the late 70s. It was an important book for many people on the journey, myself included. xx

Anonymous Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 3:11pm

Hi Leah. I like the way you have challenged conventional wisdom. I am not sure about this one. I can't say I love myself totally. I like parts of my character but I know myself more than anyone else and my motives are sometimes questionable as are other aspects! I love my children more than I love myself and have always put (unwittingly and instinctively I think) other people's interests before my own. As the years go by, I have accepted myself more, for all my faults. I think all I can say truthfully is that I think I'm not that bad after all! And kindness to others and to oneself is all that matters really.

readerwriter Fri, Oct 30th 2015 @ 2:56pm

Love in the broadest sense, of a calm acceptance. I don't love being depressed, but fearing it, and all the behaviours that hide it make it 10 times worse. I can love myself when I'm depressed, accept that this is what it is, and this will pass with time and care.... If I offer this to myself without judgement, then i can offer this to others too. And it's sustainable.

The Gardener Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 8:43am

Why do we get in stews? Mine through impetuosity I think. Rush up to people (compare myself to a large, friendly labrador) offering help, comfort, advice which is often seen as bossiness and interference. Other stews definite leap before I look. Any map I might have tried to make would have had so many deviations and crossroads I'd always been lost. My mother was much worse - you could not get in the door before the inevitable cuppa was virtually on the table - and she got quite upset if you wanted to take childrens coats off, take them to the loo - just settle after what was often, to her, arduous. The 'surface we let others see' is, for me, a stiff upper lip and a smothering of make up (if I've got time), Tears are always near - but I have to drive a car when I leave my husband. And my mother cried so much and so frequently (heard of Lord Lundy?) that I swore I never would - adding, I think, too much stress when I forced myself not to cry. Tears yesterday when a daughter I thought could not face the situation sent a lovely text - she's 'in the list'. All I want is our usual gossip round the table with the odd vino. I discovered she thought she would have to help nursing - and as she is childless intimate details would scare her stiff. Thanks Les, always have a struggle answering your blogs with anything 'concrete', perhaps that's not the point.

susan Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 10:05am

Hi Gardener, i don't often reply to your comments but just want you to know that i always send up a little prayer for you. You are a very strong and clever lady dealing with massive challenges. Take good care of yourself. xx

Leah Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 9:04am

Gardener,
I am so glad your daughter has texted you and cleared up misunderstandings. I cried too reading your comments.
I always like reading your comments and getting a glimpse into your past and present.

susan Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 10:09am

Hi Les, i am too often in a stew and the stew doesn't allow me to look after myself properly which is of course what's needed for all the good things to start up -- growth, insight, intuition, helping and loving others properly, etc. But we're all on the road here, and we're all getting there at our own speeds. Thanks for helping us along. xx

Mary Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 1:18pm

Like the Gardener, myb stews are caused by an excess of enthusiasm which is often misinterpreted as flirting (nobody seems to have noticed that women too get the same treatment). More often when I am up than down.

Debs Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 2:54pm

Its a fine line isn't it - how much time we spend unearthing our pain and how much we spend living? I find it empowering to know myself (how else can 'to thine ownself be true' be a reality?) but I reach a point where I'm digging so deep I forget to make a meaningful contribution to the planet. At some point there comes a time to take action. We can keep digging forever and get lost in the mire or we can say 'enough now, I will use this pain to good end'. Of course some people never look beneath the surface for fear of what lurks there and that isn't beneficial either... A balance is what's important, an old-fashioned set of scales with 'internal exploration' on one side and 'taking action' on the other. I think it was Aristotle who said 'The unexamined life is not worth living'.... I think he meant looking at our beliefs and behaviours, understanding and adjusting accordingly. What I don't think he meant was overexamining, analysing, prodding, poking and sifting through every little crum of our lives and experiences. The overexamined life is equally as unfulfilling as the former.... its just a bit more expensive ;-) xx

LillyPet Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 5:39pm

I like that Debs, it so often boils down to balance. LPXx

Bearofliddlebrain Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 6:57pm

An excellent way of responding Debs...you are so bright and clever.

The Gardener Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 5:21pm

Les's 'so much pain, so much hurt'. My sagas continue, very self-indulgent but today's experiences might put new 'courage' into those who are facing seemingly insurmountable problems. An earlier blog this week was that you CAN go further than you think you can. I arrived at the hospital, husband could not hear, or speak, and would not wake up. The fabulous nurses did their best - then, his b/p dropped alarmingly, all hell let loose. We thought he was going. He started to speak a little, seemed he had a stroke. He was attached to everything possible, luckily he was too weak to pull them out again. He rallied, and they decided to do a brain scan in case the low sodium levels had caused a clot on the brain. The brilliant young doctor called me aside. He might have had a mild heart attack. She impressed on me that the policy was NOT to resuscitate a man of his age and condition (I would have been against it anyway). But she said in the event of a clot they WOULD operate - I said I would not let him suffer further, I must consult family. She did not tell me the alternatives, but the scan was clear. Meanwhile, eldest son had apprised the entire family, including the adopted daughter who has not spoken to us for four years, of the situation. They ALL replied, all behind me whatever I have to decide. An utterly unexpected and un-hoped for injection of strength. Hopefully I can put the church robes on display after all as a joyous display and a thank you for the beauty in the world.

Bearofliddlebrain Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 6:56pm

Phew...TG...I'm worn out just reading your daily instalments - you cope wonderfully and that is to your credit, resilience and love for your dear husband. I am relieved - as you must be, that your family are backing you in what will be the most horrendous decisions you will have to make. May you and all the visitors to your exhibition find much joy. Deep breaths dear girl, deep breaths. Thinking of you and Mr TG.... Bear x

LillyPet Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 6:20pm

TG, I'm so glad that the scan was clear, that not only did your eldest son come through again, but a much needed boost of strenth from the whole family. Wonderful! LP :)

Bearofliddlebrain Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 6:51pm

Hi Les, like Leah, above, I find it easier to give love wherever I find I need and want to. Have loved and given so much to others, but I cannot always same the same for loving myself. Have been a loving daughter, daughter-in-law, wife, mother, sister and friend. I only pull back when I feel the love isn't reciprocated or when I am treated badly....self-preservation finally took over when a good 'friend' decided to be so unkind that I had to finally say that I could no longer continue with the friendship and the reasons why. It hurt for ages after, but now I think I am relieved that I don't have to put up with the snide remarks and nasty comments that I didn't deserve. Maybe I love myself more than I think I do!
Thanks Les...Bear x

Ruth Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 8:03pm

I don't understand how to know when someone comes alongside you on the road less travelled if that person will be a good and faithful companion or someone who pulls you down and slows your journey to a happier life.

Bearofliddlebrain Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 9:33pm

Hi Ruth, I don't think we can ever know who will be a good companion or who will drag us down on this bumpy road...but travel it we must! I just hope we can be brave enough to let go of those who seek to do us harm and hold on to those who want to travel happily with us. Oh, and learn from both sets of peeps when we meet either kind! Bear hug x

The Gardener Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 8:04pm

I hope I am not using Moodscope as a 'wailing wall'. Yes, my blogs are current personal suffering, but each one has come out of the 'blog of the day' or the answers. A few days ago, again I think it was Les, it was said 'we can always go farther than we think we can;. Today has proved it, BUT not without massive back up. Barack Obama's 'yes we can' is a good start. We humans were created as an incredible machine, physical and mental. We were also supplied with talents - many of us don't draw on them or waste them. You only have to think of concentration camps to know the extent of human endurance. But, given inner strength, you then harness all that is available round you, in whatever form. 2 weeks of that lesson has convinced me. Over and out, love and huge hugs to everybody out there - nice comfy fleece you lot are.

Bearofliddlebrain Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 9:30pm

We are a Moodscope blankie x

Les Thu, Oct 29th 2015 @ 11:14pm

Hi Everyone..................thanks for all the great and personal inputs......I'm giving a presentation tomorrow and have been travelling most of the day - so unable to sit down now and reply to everyone in the way I often do...... Good luck T.G ...........and Ruth......if someone comes alongside....'feel' it with your heart if they are a 'leaner' or a 'lifter'..... "You can have comfort or you can have courage - but not both." Brene Brown (check out her TED talk - wonderful

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