Moodscope's blog

24

December


Merry Christmas Blues. Tuesday December 24, 2013

I was a bit of a child prodigy when it comes to depression, having my first attack at seven years old. It happened at Christmas and I can still remember being in bed (because it very often takes a form similar to ME), looking at the lovely turkey dinner my mother had brought up, with beautifully crispy potatoes (my favourite) and not wanting even a bite of it. There was the noise of Christmas jollity coming from downstairs; the sounds of my brother and sister playing with whatever they had been given and it had no relevance or significance whatsoever. I just wanted to go to sleep until it was all over.

Forty odd years ago, of course, it wasn't recognised as depression. I think they put it down to end of term exhaustion and nobody seemed much bothered about it.

The depression has occurred at Christmas a couple of times since. Each time it has not been particularly the exhaustion or dark mood that has been most hard to bear, but the sense of isolation. Even in the middle of a family playing a loud and hilariously funny game, I am stuck in what seems like an enormous goldfish bowl; the walls of murky glass meters thick. I can see things going on outside the bowl, but I can't get to or feel any of it.

And I've learned that it's OK to be there. The extended family just think "Oh, Mary's a bit tired: she's been overdoing it". My immediate family know I'm ill and tend to be a bit more protective than usual (bless them). I've learned that if nobody expects Uncle David to give horsy-rides to the children because of his dodgy back, then nobody expects me to be the life and soul if the blues have got me again.

There's never a good time to have depression. Christmas is a particularly grim time to suffer, as is the summer holidays. The important thing to recognise is that there is no contractual obligation to be happy and jolly at Christmas. The phase "Merry Christmas" is a hopeful wish, not a command set in stone.

I wish us all Peace this Yuletide, fortitude of Spirit and Endurance. Regardless of the state of our mental health we will all benefit from these.

Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment on our Blogspot:

http://moodscope.blogspot.com/2013/12/merry-christmas-blues.html


Permalink  |  Blog Home

Comments

Comments are viewable only by members. Register Now to participate in the discussion.

Already have an account? Login to leave a comment.

There are 24 comments so far.

What is Moodscope?

Moodscope members seek to support each other by sharing their experiences through this blog. If you’d like to receive these daily posts by email, just sign up to Moodscope now, completely free of charge.

Moodscope is an innovative way for people to treat their own low mood problems using an engaging online tool. Anyone in the world can accurately assess and track daily mood scores over a period of time. We have proved that the very act of measuring, tracking and sharing mood can actually lift it. Join now.

Blog Archive

Disclaimer

Posts and comments on the Moodscope blog are the personal views of Moodscope members, they are for informational purposes only and do not constitute medical advice. Moodscope makes no representations as to the accuracy or completeness of any information on this blog or found by following any of the links.

Moodscope will not be liable for any errors or omissions in this information nor for the availability of this information. The owner will not be liable for any losses, injuries, or damages from the display or use of this information.

We exist to help people to positively manage their moods. You can contribute by taking the test, sharing your experience on the blog or contributing funds so we can keep it free for all who need it.

Moodscope® is © Moodscope Ltd 2018. Developed from scales which are © 1988 American Psychological Association. Cannot be reproduced without express written permission of APA.